June 16, 2020 NYPD Sends Controller to Crime Lab After Officer Loses in Smash Bros NYPD Sends Controller to Crime Lab After Officer Loses in Smash Bros NEW YORK ā The NYPD confirmed today that they have launched an official investigation into the controller purchased at a local GameStop by policeman Steve…
June 15, 2020 Despised Animal Crossing Villager Canāt Afford to Move Away Despised Animal Crossing Villager Canāt Afford to Move Away DESERTED ISLAND ā Local Animal Crossing villager Ursala has been forced to continue receiving daily harassment on the deserted island she inhabits due to her…
June 13, 2020 Doug Bowser Brings His Eight Horrible Children to Work With Him Doug Bowser Brings His Eight Horrible Children to Work With Him REDMOND, Wash. ā A miscommunication involving daycare arrangements has forced Nintendo of America President Doug Bowser to bring his astonishingly misbehaved children to work with…
June 7, 2020 Happy Mask Salesman Immediately Sells Out Entire Stock of N95 Deku Masks Happy Mask Salesman Immediately Sells Out Entire Stock of N95 Deku Masks CLOCK TOWN āĀ Selling out his entire inventory after five minutes of announcing a restock, the Happy Mask Salesman announced to disappointed customers that his N95…
May 28, 2020 Ash Ketchum’s Mom Doesn’t Have the Heart to Tell Him His Original Pikachu Died 6 Years Ago Ash Ketchum’s Mom Doesn’t Have the Heart to Tell Him His Original Pikachu Died 6 Years Ago KANTO ā Local mother Delia Ketchum reportedly doesnāt have the heart to tell her son Ash that his beloved Pikachu is the sixth in a…
May 26, 2020 Millennial Shares How He Paid Off Home Loan by Scrimping, Saving, and Being Tom Nook’s Adopted Son Timmy Millennial Shares How He Paid Off Home Loan by Scrimping, Saving, and Being Tom Nook’s Adopted Son Timmy Much has been said about millennialsā financial struggles. Many drown in debt while doing little more than hanging out on the beach, hanging out with…
May 24, 2020 Gamer Training Months for Melee Tournament Heartbroken Upon Discovering They Didnāt Mean āGodzilla: Destroy All Monsters Meleeā Gamer Training Months for Melee Tournament Heartbroken Upon Discovering They Didnāt Mean āGodzilla: Destroy All Monsters Meleeā JACKSONVILLE, Fla. ā Dedicated Godzilla: Destroy All Monsters Melee player Duncan Cooker was recently disappointed to realize that the āMeleeā tournament heād been preparing for…
May 19, 2020 Man Playing āAnimal Crossingā Shops for Clothes for First Time in 10 Years Man Playing āAnimal Crossingā Shops for Clothes for First Time in 10 Years MIDDLEBURY, Vt. ā Local gamer Greg Stephens visited the Able Sisters clothing shop this morning to purchase new items for his Animal Crossing character, marking…
May 16, 2020 Man Sets Unrealistic Fitness Goal of Looking Good in Switch Screen Reflection Man Sets Unrealistic Fitness Goal of Looking Good in Switch Screen Reflection CAYCE, S.C. ā Local gamer James Larson recently announced his wildly unrealistic fitness goal of looking good in the reflection of his Switch screen.Ā āIām…
