December 23, 2020 Door to Entry-Level Job Barred From Other Side Door to Entry-Level Job Barred From Other Side LOS ANGELES — Local graphic designer Max Norman attempted to access an entry-level job this week, only to find that it was barred from the…
December 22, 2020 COVID Surge Pushes Local Medical Center Over Maximum Capacity of Six COVID Surge Pushes Local Medical Center Over Maximum Capacity of Six KANTO — Recent surges of coronavirus have taxed local medical centers, pushing one facility to the edge of overflow by filling all six slots at…
December 21, 2020 New Wall Street Journal Opinion Piece Calls Out Dr Disrespect for Not Being Medical Doctor New Wall Street Journal Opinion Piece Calls Out Dr Disrespect for Not Being Medical Doctor NEW YORK — Following a controversial opinion piece wherein columnist Joseph Epstein beseeched Jill Biden to drop the “doctor” title from her name due to…
December 21, 2020 Cyberpunk 2077 QA Team Horrified to Learn Game Has Already Released Cyberpunk 2077 QA Team Horrified to Learn Game Has Already Released WARSAW — After emerging from their offices for the first time in months following long hours crunching on Cyberpunk 2077, Quality Assurance team members of…
December 19, 2020 PS4 With ‘Cyberpunk’ Downloaded Listed on eBay Just In Case Anyone’s Stupid Enough to Go for That PS4 With ‘Cyberpunk’ Downloaded Listed on eBay Just In Case Anyone’s Stupid Enough to Go for That DALLAS — Local gamer Carter Evans has reportedly listed his PS4 console containing a digital download of the now-delisted Cyberpunk 2077 on eBay just in…
December 19, 2020 Long-Lost Father Coming to Fortnite Long-Lost Father Coming to Fortnite CARY, N.C. — Epic Games has announced that the new DLC character coming to their hit battle royale video game Fortnite is Kevin Schumacher, the…
December 19, 2020 If You Think All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers, You’re a Fucking Idiot If You Think All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers, You’re a Fucking Idiot There’s an article going around today, making the ridiculous argument that all TV remotes should actually be gaming controllers. I haven’t read the article—I don’t…
December 19, 2020 It’s Time to Admit That All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers It’s Time to Admit That All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers As our technology gets better and better, people become attached to the familiar. Old interfaces become the preferred, retro designs come back into play, and…
December 18, 2020 Twitch Bans All Mentions of Virgin Mary and Incel Joseph Twitch Bans All Mentions of Virgin Mary and Incel Joseph SAN FRANCISCO — Just before Christmas, video streaming platform Twitch has banned users from making any mention of the Virgin Mary, the Incel Joseph or…
