March 22, 2020 HDMI Cord Seemingly Connected to the Abyss HDMI Cord Seemingly Connected to the Abyss SHAMONG, N.J. — After attempting to disconnect her Xbox One, local gamer Kim Mahoney discovered that her HDMI cord was apparently connected to a bottomless…
March 21, 2020 Steam Friend You Don’t Remember Adding Is Playing Morrowind Again Steam Friend You Don’t Remember Adding Is Playing Morrowind Again SAN DIEGO — While waiting for members of his Monster Hunter group to gather up early yesterday evening, local gamer Vincent McKay reported yet another…
March 18, 2020 Nation Comes Together In Time of Solidarity to Tolerate Playthrough of Jackbox Party Pack Nation Comes Together In Time of Solidarity to Tolerate Playthrough of Jackbox Party Pack WASHINGTON — Quarantined citizens around the country have reportedly come together in solidarity to tolerate playthroughs of various Jackbox Party Packs in an effort to…
March 18, 2020 Quarantine Leaves Introvert Home Alone with Nobody to Tell About What an Introvert He Is Quarantine Leaves Introvert Home Alone with Nobody to Tell About What an Introvert He Is NEW YORK — Self-described introvert Barry Laughlin is reportedly struggling to stay sane during the 14-day coronavirus quarantine period, complaining that the isolation has left…
March 16, 2020 We Broke Down the PlayStation 5 Prototype and Did Our Best to Put it Back Together Before Sony Came Back We Broke Down the PlayStation 5 Prototype and Did Our Best to Put it Back Together Before Sony Came Back There is no more feverish time in the world of video games than the dawn of a new generation of consoles. Details regarding the upcoming…
March 13, 2020 Police Manhunt Underway for Man Who Didn’t Pay for WinRAR License After 40 Day Trial Police Manhunt Underway for Man Who Didn’t Pay for WinRAR License After 40 Day Trial FRESNO, Calif. — New police helicopter video shows the massive response to accused WinRAR License thief Michael Ramsey as fifteen squad cars chased him down…
March 13, 2020 Hideo Kojima Either Teasing Death Stranding Sequel Or Just Tweeting Photos Of Different Boxes He Likes Hideo Kojima Either Teasing Death Stranding Sequel Or Just Tweeting Photos Of Different Boxes He Likes TOKYO — Hideo Kojima fans are obsessively looking for clues in the director’s latest string of cryptic tweets, which sources say could either be teasing…
March 10, 2020 Throwaway Reddit Account Does Nothing to Obscure User’s Identity Throwaway Reddit Account Does Nothing to Obscure User’s Identity MONTGOMERY, Ala. — Justin Curry’s post on Reddit’s r/relationship_advice under the username u/throwawaythekeys92 did absolutely nothing to hide his identity as a result of his…
March 10, 2020 Physicists Discover That Universe Began as Arma 3 Mod Physicists Discover That Universe Began as Arma 3 Mod CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — Researchers at MIT’s Center for Theoretical Physics were shocked to discover that the universe as we know it began as a mod…
