sex

Embarrassed Ridley Assures Smash Player He’s Much Bigger CanonicallyEmbarrassed Ridley Assures Smash Player He’s Much Bigger Canonically

Embarrassed Ridley Assures Smash Player He’s Much Bigger Canonically

SCHENECTADY, N.Y. — Dragon-like space pirate and Super Smash Bros. Ultimate fighter Ridley assured a teary-eyed man controlling his moves…

4 years ago
Porn Parody ‘Girls Done Quick’ Not Particularly PopularPorn Parody ‘Girls Done Quick’ Not Particularly Popular

Porn Parody ‘Girls Done Quick’ Not Particularly Popular

LOS ANGELES — Girls Done Quick, a new livestreamed porn parody of the hit video game convention Games Done Quick…

4 years ago
Speedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm ValidSpeedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm Valid

Speedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm Valid

SACRAMENTO — Video game speedrunner Ashton Clemens insisted that a significant portion of his girlfriend’s orgasms were completed incorrectly, arguing…

4 years ago
Dungeon Master Sneaks a Few Real Dice in With Those Sex OnesDungeon Master Sneaks a Few Real Dice in With Those Sex Ones

Dungeon Master Sneaks Few Real Dice in With Those Sex Ones

PITTSBURGH — A recent attempt at invigorating the intimacy of Dana Boyer’s relationship with an avid role-playing fanatic ended horribly…

5 years ago
Girlfriend Has No Idea Sex Playlist Is Just Old School RuneScape SoundtrackGirlfriend Has No Idea Sex Playlist Is Just Old School RuneScape Soundtrack

Girlfriend Has No Idea Sex Playlist Is Just Old School RuneScape Soundtrack

PHOENIX — Local girlfriend Marissa Andrews is reportedly unaware that the playlist her boyfriend put on during sex last week…

5 years ago
Shigeru Miyamoto Delays Orgasm for Quality PurposesShigeru Miyamoto Delays Orgasm for Quality Purposes

Shigeru Miyamoto Delays Orgasm for Quality Purposes

KYOTO, Japan — Shigeru Miyamoto announced today that in order to make sure he lives up to his highest standards,…

5 years ago
Boyfriend Apologizes for Load TimeBoyfriend Apologizes for Load Time

Boyfriend Apologizes for Load Time

SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Recent sexual partner Nathan Stenhouse has released an apology for his unacceptably short load time during last…

5 years ago
Boyfriend Can’t Find the CritBoyfriend Can’t Find the Crit

Boyfriend Can’t Find the Crit

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local woman Anita Harrison expressed disappointment during a game of Dungeons and Dragons when her boyfriend Steven…

5 years ago
Autosave Doesn’t Feel as Good as the Real ThingAutosave Doesn’t Feel as Good as the Real Thing

Autosave Doesn’t Feel as Good as the Real Thing

CHRISTCHURCH, New Zealand — Although experts are split on precisely why, a study of gamers worldwide has determined that the…

5 years ago