school

Professor Byleth Struggles to Teach Wyvern Riding Class Remotely

GARREG MACH — Officers Academy professor Byleth expressed frustration today at the continued restrictions on in-person instruction for their Wyvern…

4 years ago

Betsy DeVos Calls for Public Schools to Be Defunded After Witnessing Rodney Mullen Do 360 Kickflip Through Gymnasium Roof

SCHOOL II — U.S. Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos demanded funding cuts after witnessing a professional skateboarder do a 360…

4 years ago

Loser Spends Three Years Earning Master’s Degree When He Could’ve Been Writing Sick D&D Campaign

RALEIGH, N.C. — A local graduate’s Masters of Fine Arts degree was tainted by the realization the past three years…

4 years ago

Opinion: Pikmin 3 Deluxe Re-Release Comes Just in Time to Teach Children the Value of Mass Sacrifice

Our nation’s schools are facing a crisis — not a crisis of health, but a crisis of fear. Parents, misinformed…

4 years ago

Study Shows Average Anime High School Student Needs 9 Seasons to Graduate

KYOTO, Japan — A troubling new study from the University of Hidari Wakibara has found that it takes a typical…

5 years ago

Desperate History Teacher Starts Calling Everything ‘Lore’

MIDVALE, Utah — In an attempt to invigorate his students with a passion for learning, AP U.S. History teacher Frederick…

5 years ago

Hardass Professor Won’t Allow Students to Cite Bulbapedia

PALLET TOWN, Kanto — World famous Pokémon researcher Professor Samuel Oak has enraged students by not letting them use Bulbapedia…

6 years ago

Cops Plant DOOM on School Shooter’s Computer

GLEN ROCK, N.J. — After sixteen-year-old Alex Stone opened fire at Glen Rock High School, killing ten students and injuring…

6 years ago