RPG

Asshole D&D Player Can’t Make Session Because ‘Their Parents Died’Asshole D&D Player Can’t Make Session Because ‘Their Parents Died’

Asshole D&D Player Can’t Make Session Because ‘Their Parents Died’

MIDDLETON, Wis. — Local dipshit and occasional tabletop gamer Christian Taylor has cancelled on his supposedly regular Dungeons and Dragons…

4 years ago
Dog Wastes Only Inventory Slot on FrisbeeDog Wastes Only Inventory Slot on Frisbee

Dog Wastes Only Inventory Slot on Frisbee

SEATTLE — Adorable old english sheepdog and total noob, Pancakes, blew the only slot in his extremely limited inventory on…

5 years ago
RPG Town Shop Goes Bankrupt After Buying $10,000 in Trinkets From AdventurerRPG Town Shop Goes Bankrupt After Buying $10,000 in Trinkets From Adventurer

RPG Town Shop Goes Bankrupt After Buying $10,000 in Trinkets From Adventurer

NETINNDEL — An RPG shop owner has been forced to close up his local shop and declare bankruptcy after buying…

5 years ago
World’s Most Boring Video Game Player Raises Defense StatWorld’s Most Boring Video Game Player Raises Defense Stat

World’s Most Boring Video Game Player Raises Defense Stat

PEORIA, Ill. — Friends of Shaun Conner were disappointed but unsurprised as he continually raised the defense stat of his…

5 years ago
Miniboss Laying It on a Little Thick With Pre-Battle SpeechMiniboss Laying It on a Little Thick With Pre-Battle Speech

Miniboss Laying It on Little Thick With Pre-Battle Speech

REALM OF DISDAIN — Shortly before losing a recent battle with an adventurer, local mid-level demon Ulgruuf the Unyielding reportedly…

5 years ago
Realm’s Chosen Savior Agonizing at Lair Entrance Whether to Drop Broadsword or ScimitarRealm’s Chosen Savior Agonizing at Lair Entrance Whether to Drop Broadsword or Scimitar

Realm’s Chosen Savior Agonizing at Lair Entrance Whether to Drop Broadsword or Scimitar

HYMERA — At the end of a harrowing journey to rescue his land from certain devastation, steadfast warrior Demetrios Cherwink…

5 years ago
Man On His Deathbed Still Saving Fully Charged Meter AttackMan On His Deathbed Still Saving Fully Charged Meter Attack

Man On His Deathbed Still Saving Fully Charged Meter Attack

ROCHESTER, Minn. — Dying 80-year-old man Rex Titus revealed to friends and family today that, after a decade of battling…

5 years ago
Employees Returning to Work for First Time in Months Discover Office Overrun by WeedsEmployees Returning to Work for First Time in Months Discover Office Overrun by Weeds

Employees Returning to Work for First Time in Months Discover Office Overrun by Weeds

TAMPA, Fla. — Employees returning to the local offices of Seabass Accounting & Tax Services this week were reportedly shocked…

5 years ago
RPG Quests Distract Player From Hours of Riveting Menu GameplayRPG Quests Distract Player From Hours of Riveting Menu Gameplay

RPG Quests Distract Player From Hours of Riveting Menu Gameplay

WHITE PLAINS, N.Y. — After sinking a solid weekend into the RPG Manifest Beyond, local gamer Mallory Cruz began to…

5 years ago