June 28, 2021 Guy You Just Met Thinks You Would Really Love Only Game He Played This Year Guy You Just Met Thinks You Would Really Love Only Game He Played This Year GREENSBORO, N.C. — The guy talking to you at this house party thinks you’re the kind of person who would enjoy Disco Elysium, the only…
June 23, 2021 Vampire Requests Invite to Open Xbox Live Party Vampire Requests Invite to Open Xbox Live Party FORKS, Wash. — Local vampiric gamer FaNg DaNKula was seen requesting an invite to an open Xbox Live Party in order to join it, as…
July 23, 2020 Racist JRPG Fan Casts Heal on Entire Party Whenever Black Character Injured Racist JRPG Fan Casts Heal on Entire Party Whenever Black Character Injured BOSTON — Offending his viewers by asserting that all of his characters’ hit points matter equally, JRPG enthusiast and known racist William Jepsen came under…
March 28, 2020 Newly Hatched Baby Pokémon Gains 23 Levels Watching Dragonite Beat Shit Out of Gym Leader Newly Hatched Baby Pokémon Gains 23 Levels Watching Dragonite Beat Shit Out of Gym Leader KANTO — Several minutes after being hatched from an egg received from a nearby day care center, a newborn baby Squirtle gained 23 levels at…
September 21, 2017 College Student’s Fast Travel Ability Unlocked by Bottle of Tequila College Student’s Fast Travel Ability Unlocked by Bottle of Tequila GAINESVILLE, Fla. — UF sophomore Michelle Stevens claims to have fast traveled to her dorm room after downing a bottle of “Se Tiene Especial” Tequila,…
