parents

Asshole D&D Player Can’t Make Session Because ‘Their Parents Died’

MIDDLETON, Wis. — Local dipshit and occasional tabletop gamer Christian Taylor has cancelled on his supposedly regular Dungeons and Dragons…

3 years ago

Why We’re Replacing Review Scores With Photo of Either an Approving or Disapproving Parent

As any self-respecting video game review reader knows, reviewing video games is really hard work and nothing hurts more than…

4 years ago

Kids With Two Living Parents Demand Representation in Disney Films

BURBANK, Cali. — A protest was held outside Disney headquarters earlier this week by the organization Kids of Two Loving…

4 years ago

Parents Blame Poorly-Made Video Games For Son’s Annoying, Glitchy Outbursts

TRENTON, N.J. — Claiming their child hasn’t been the same since he started gaming, concerned parents Mark and Liza Kristensen…

5 years ago

Disappointment After Dad Announces ‘Mom 2’

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — After waiting through three years of divorce, local brothers Jimmy and Kiernan Henderson received a surprise…

5 years ago

Gamer Parent Calls Every Piece of Son’s Sport Equipment Nike

KATY, Texas — Local parent and avid gamer Ashley Garcia reportedly refers to every piece of her son’s sports equipment…

5 years ago

Nation’s Parents Confirm Top New Streamer Named ‘Fungo’ or Something Along Those Lines

COLUMBIA, S.C. — An advocacy group of American parents announced this morning that the top new personality on the Twitch…

6 years ago