February 7, 2018 New Black Mirror Theory Explains How Every Episode Fits into Zelda Timeline New Black Mirror Theory Explains How Every Episode Fits into Zelda Timeline A fan theory demonstrating how every episode of Black Mirror falls perfectly within the Zelda timeline has been developed by anonymous Reddit user u/Waldo-Cucoo. Waldo-Cucoo…
February 5, 2018 Mario Sent into Existential Crisis After Losing Go-Kart Race to Baby Version of Self Mario Sent into Existential Crisis After Losing Go-Kart Race to Baby Version of Self MUSHROOM KINGDOM — Following the first race of this year’s 150cc Star Cup, Mario was sent into an existential crisis, having finished several places behind…
February 2, 2018 Director of Mario Movie Revealed to be Two Gloved Hands Director of Mario Movie Revealed to be Two Gloved Hands KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo announced today in a press release that the future Mario film will be directed by two large disembodied hands covered in…
January 27, 2018 “Super Waluigi Odyssey” Indefinitely Shelved Due to Excessive Nudity “Super Waluigi Odyssey” Indefinitely Shelved Due to Excessive Nudity REDMOND, Wash. — Nintendo told fans today that it will not be releasing the previously announced “Super Waluigi Odyssey” in the foreseeable future, citing it’s…
January 18, 2018 Nintendo Finally Manages to Sell Wii U Boxes Nintendo Finally Manages to Sell Wii U Boxes KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo announced today that it will finally be able to make the Wii U a success by reselling the leftover boxes from…
January 9, 2018 Nintendo Announces XL SNES Classic Nintendo Announces XL SNES Classic TOKYO, Japan — Nintendo announced today that they would be releasing a new version of the SNES Classic called the XL SNES Classic that upgrades…
December 17, 2017 Woman Nostalgic About First Vibrator Woman Nostalgic About First Vibrator DENVER — With the holiday season in full swing, Samantha Loden fondly remembers her first vibrator: An N64 Controller with Rumble Pak attachment. “In 6th…
November 24, 2017 Nintendo Gearing up for Holiday Season by Destroying Any Remaining Stock Nintendo Gearing up for Holiday Season by Destroying Any Remaining Stock KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo is preparing for the upcoming holiday season by making sure every remaining game and console are destroyed, with its critically lauded Switch…
November 12, 2017 Nintendo Announces Two-Cans-and-a-String Multiplayer System Nintendo Announces Two-Cans-and-a-String Multiplayer System KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo announced today the Nintendo String, their new voice-chat product for multiplayer games. The String, a new communication device consisting of two…
