destiny 2

Modern Day Sisyphus Doomed to Grind in Destiny 2 Forever

GROTON, Conn. — In a sisyphean twist of fate, local man Nick Andino purchased Destiny 2: Forsaken, and now must…

5 years ago

Where Is Xur This Week? Seriously, We Need to Know Because His Family Is Worried About Him

There’s a ton of awesome loot in Destiny 2, especially in the latest expansion, Forsaken. But the best weapons can…

5 years ago

Bungie Incorporates ‘Masturbate’ Emote Into Destiny 2 so Players Can Truly Go Fuck Themselves

BELLEVUE, Wash. — After intense player demands and complaints, Bungie finally announced a new addition to the Destiny 2 Eververse…

6 years ago

GameStop Employee Whips Himself in Back Room After Failing to Sell Pre-Order

BINGHAMTON, N.Y. —  GameStop sales representative Donald Simpson quietly walked to the employee breakroom and proceeded to whip himself after…

7 years ago