January 8, 2021 Kumail Nanjiani Accidentally Crushes Fifth PS5 Controller This Week Kumail Nanjiani Accidentally Crushes Fifth PS5 Controller This Week LOS ANGELES — Kumail Nanjiani has accidentally shattered a DualSense controller into a thousand pieces for the fifth time this week, this time while trying…
December 19, 2020 If You Think All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers, You’re a Fucking Idiot If You Think All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers, You’re a Fucking Idiot There’s an article going around today, making the ridiculous argument that all TV remotes should actually be gaming controllers. I haven’t read the article—I don’t…
December 19, 2020 It’s Time to Admit That All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers It’s Time to Admit That All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers As our technology gets better and better, people become attached to the familiar. Old interfaces become the preferred, retro designs come back into play, and…
October 20, 2020 Trump Refuses to Pass Controller After Character Dies Trump Refuses to Pass Controller After Character Dies WASHINGTON — Continuing his trend of bucking universally accepted social norms, President Donald Trump today announced his refusal to pass the controller to anybody else,…
August 22, 2020 Gamer’s Left Thumb Sore From Sprinting All Day Gamer’s Left Thumb Sore From Sprinting All Day WATERTOWN, Mass. — Local gamer Terence Vallee has been pushing his body well past its comfort level during gaming sessions, leaving his left thumb incredibly…
July 16, 2020 Only One Way to Find Out If Start Button Will Pause or Skip Crucial Cutscene Only One Way to Find Out If Start Button Will Pause or Skip Crucial Cutscene TAMPA, Fla. — Local gamer Kristine Rivera reportedly held her bladder for 12 painful minutes last night, unsure if pressing the start button would pause…
July 12, 2020 Triangle Button Just Happy to Be Included Triangle Button Just Happy to Be Included PS4 CONTROLLER — Though it is used sparingly in many gameplay situations, local PS4 button Triangle insisted that it is happy just to be included…
June 16, 2020 NYPD Sends Controller to Crime Lab After Officer Loses in Smash Bros NYPD Sends Controller to Crime Lab After Officer Loses in Smash Bros NEW YORK — The NYPD confirmed today that they have launched an official investigation into the controller purchased at a local GameStop by policeman Steve…
March 31, 2020 Refurbished Joy Con Won’t Stop Talking About Its Trip to San Francisco Refurbished Joy Con Won’t Stop Talking About Its Trip to San Francisco AKRON, Ohio — A joy con that was recently mailed back from San Francisco after having some drift issues repaired by Nintendo reportedly won’t stop…
