A song of ice and fire

Man Rereading ‘A Song of Ice and Fire’ to Prepare for Release of Book 6 Worried His One-Page-a-Day Pace Too Fast

ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local fantasy fan Geoffrey Parsons is reportedly worried that his A Song of Ice and Fire reread,…

4 years ago

Local Wedding Linked to 3,500 Deaths

WESTEROS — Following an exhaustive contact tracing study, a recent Riverlands wedding has been linked to 3,500 deaths, sources report.…

4 years ago

Stephen King Bangs Out ‘The Winds of Winter’ on Tuesday for Shits and Giggles

BANGOR, Maine —  Prolific horror writer Stephen King reportedly penned the long-anticipated sixth book in George R. R. Martin’s A…

5 years ago

Thousands of Parents Now Regret Naming Their Children ‘Game of Thrones’

UNITED STATES — Following the series finale of HBO’s massively successful series, parents around the nation are feeling remorse and…

6 years ago

Campaign Finishes Three-Year Run Without DM

BELFAST, Ireland – Players of a local fantasy role-playing game expressed relief and exhaustion today after completing their campaign, ending…

6 years ago

‘Game of Thrones’ Prepares for Final Climactic Clash Between Those Who Think It’s Still Good and Those Who Think It Sucks Dick Now

NEW YORK — As HBO’s hit show Game of Thrones comes to a conclusion, fans are preparing for the grand…

6 years ago

Inept Hacker Leaks Game of Thrones Season 3 Episode 4

GHENT, Belgium — Notably awful hacker Nicolas Peeters successfully leaked an episode of the hit HBO show Game of Thrones…

6 years ago

Game of Thrones Finale to Kill Off Millions of HBO Subscriptions

NEW YORK — In response to viewer complaints HBO had become too reluctant to dispatch high-profile characters on Game of…

6 years ago

Opinion: Listen Up Fuckfaces, I’ll Write Whenever The Goddamn Fuck I Want To

Listen up, you pathetic little nerdy fucklits: my name is George Raymond Richard Martin, and I’ll write whenever and whatever…

7 years ago