June 28, 2017 I Don’t Care If You Agree With His Policies, Bowser Is Your King I Don’t Care If You Agree With His Policies, Bowser Is Your King Not your king, huh? Grow up. Quick question: are you a citizen of the Mushroom Kingdom? And is there a giant black flag with Bowser’s…
June 27, 2017 Black Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item Shop Black Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item Shop CORNELIA, World A — A heated confrontation took place at the item shop earlier today, involving a black mage who claims he was being unfairly…
June 26, 2017 Crappy Controller Lets Friend Know Exactly Where He Stands Crappy Controller Lets Friend Know Exactly Where He Stands ENOLA, P.A. — Matthew Bowen discovered last night exactly where he stands with his group of friends after receiving the crappy controller on GameCube night.…
June 23, 2017 WoW Releases Limited Edition Mountain Dew IV Drip Promotion WoW Releases Limited Edition Mountain Dew IV Drip Promotion IRVINE, Calif. — Blizzard Entertainment unveiled an unprecedented collaboration with PepsiCo this morning: a Warcraft-branded, intravenous game-fuel delivery system entitled “MTN DEW Citrus Drip.” “Following…
June 22, 2017 Bill Maher Apologizes for Using Racial Slur During Overwatch Match Bill Maher Apologizes for Using Racial Slur During Overwatch Match LOS ANGELES — Bill Maher apologized on Friday night’s broadcast of Real Time after using a hateful epithet during a recent online match of the…
June 21, 2017 Guy Reloads by Shooting Kid Offscreen Guy Reloads by Shooting Kid Offscreen HEMPSTEAD, N.Y. — Brian Applegate has developed a ritual while playing House Of The Dead at his local arcade involving shooting the game’s gun at…
June 20, 2017 Man Comes to Haunting Realization He is NPC Man Comes to Haunting Realization He is NPC NEW YORK — Darian Rumfield, a 25-year old man living in New York City, realized today that he is, at best, the side-character of someone…
June 19, 2017 Football Coach Wins 5 Championships by Calling Only Fake Field Goals Football Coach Wins 5 Championships by Calling Only Fake Field Goals JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — Seattle head coach Mike Rubino celebrated his fifth Super Bowl win Sunday night after calling exclusively fake field goals on his way…
June 16, 2017 The Real Life Mario: This Man is in Charge of Fixing Plumbing Issues Caused by E3 The Real Life Mario: This Man is in Charge of Fixing Plumbing Issues Caused by E3 A few days ago at E3 we spoke to Ryan Jimenez, Los Angeles Convention Center’s head custodian and favorite plumber, who is basically just like…
