Video Games

Millennial’s Retirement Portfolio Still Has Few Empty Sleeves

EVANSTON, Ill. — 28-year-old bartender Grace Federman reportedly discovered several empty sleeves in her retirement portfolio after going through the…

4 years ago

Exhausted Fan Game Developer Prays Nintendo Sends Cease and Desist Soon

LOS ANGELES — Paul Moreno, the lone developer for a dating simulator game based on Nintendo’s popular Zelda franchise, once…

4 years ago

Yoshi Okay Living Like This

DINOSAUR LAND — The perennial member of the Mario Bros clique is reportedly still content to eat and sleep in…

4 years ago

Downtrodden Golduck Puts on Belt and Jorts for Second Job as Digimon

SAFFRON CITY, Kanto — Longtime Nintendo employee and anthropomorphic bipedal duck Golduck has recently begun moonlighting as a Digimon to…

4 years ago

9-Year-Old Can’t Wait to Find Out What Fucked Up Shit Is in Game Rated E10+

SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Local 9-year-old Simon Fisher is reportedly going out of his fucking mind right now imagining all…

4 years ago

Who Reviews the Reviewers? Why We’re Adding Polls to the Bottom of Our Reviews to Let Our Writers Know If They’re Right or Wrong

Video game reviews are the backbone of the gaming industry, but why is it that only the so-called journalists hold…

4 years ago

GameStop to Start Accepting Trade-In Items That Drop From Guys You Kill

GRAPEVINE, Texas — GameStop announced today that it is expanding its trade-in program from used video games to weapons, armor,…

4 years ago

New Historical Evidence Shows People Once Played Video Games for Fun

UPPER DARBY, Pa.  — Historians and anthropologists from around the globe are clamoring as a Pennsylvania middle school time capsule…

4 years ago

Yoshi Game Just Little Too Obviously for Children

KETTERING, Ohio — Less than an hour into playing her new copy of Yoshi’s Crafted World, local gamer Maureen Teague…

4 years ago