April 30, 2020 Jackie Chan Fan Immediately Regrets Throwing Ladder at His Idol Jackie Chan Fan Immediately Regrets Throwing Ladder at His Idol LOS ANGELES — An unfortunate situation occurred today, as self described Jackie Chan “superfan” Dalton Carvey chucked a ladder at his longtime favorite actor, in…
April 29, 2020 YouTuber Unboxing Dune Board Game Freezes Up After Realizing the Gom Jabbar is Aimed at His Neck YouTuber Unboxing Dune Board Game Freezes Up After Realizing the Gom Jabbar is Aimed at His Neck SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Fans of the YouTube channel DavesCoolGames were shocked after an unboxing video of the Dune board game depicted the channel’s host…
April 29, 2020 Opinion: If You’re a Supervillain, Cut It Out Opinion: If You’re a Supervillain, Cut It Out Supervillains — those with great power who use it for nefarious purposes — need a stern talking to. It’s time to stop. Your villainy has…
April 27, 2020 Tom Hooper Suggests Re-Releasing ‘Cats’ After Shutdown Because It Seems Like Everyone Was Busy When It Came Out or Something Tom Hooper Suggests Re-Releasing ‘Cats’ After Shutdown Because It Seems Like Everyone Was Busy When It Came Out or Something LOS ANGELES — Cats director Tom Hooper suggested on social media today that theaters could re-release Cats once the quarantine ends because people seemingly missed…
April 27, 2020 Terrifying: This Writer Is Willing to Hate Any Movie for Just a Few Thousand Clicks Terrifying: This Writer Is Willing to Hate Any Movie for Just a Few Thousand Clicks Most writers like movies that are good and dislike movies that are bad, letting the internet decide who deserves the most clicks based entirely on…
April 25, 2020 Donald Trump Recommends All Americans Inject Themselves With Bleach Donald Trump Recommends All Americans Inject Themselves With Bleach WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump recommended Americans inject hit 2004 anime Bleach into their veins in order to prevent the spread of COVID-19, according to…
April 25, 2020 AMC Reopens Theaters With Strict ‘No Outside Coronavirus’ Policy AMC Reopens Theaters With Strict ‘No Outside Coronavirus’ Policy ATLANTA — AMC Theatres announced today that they will begin reopening locations across Georgia as the state begins relaxing its restrictions on non-essential businesses. Additionally,…
April 18, 2020 Vegeta Presents Goku with Lifetime Achievement Honor at Crunchyroll Awards Vegeta Presents Goku with Lifetime Achievement Honor at Crunchyroll Awards LOS ANGELES — Saiyan prince Vegeta awarded his lifelong collaborator and occasional enemy Goku with the Lifetime Achievement Award last night at the annual Crunchyroll…
April 18, 2020 Eeek! A Bug’s Life. What a Wretched Film Eeek! A Bug’s Life. What a Wretched Film Eeek! You wish to know about A Bug’s Life? What a wretched film. Such horror. Repugnance! Good heavens. Watching it, I struggle to maintain my…
