May 25, 2019 Riddler Tricks Batman Into Attending His Open Mic Set Riddler Tricks Batman Into Attending His Open Mic Set GOTHAM — The Caped Crusader has once again successfully interpreted The Riddler’s esoteric clues and thwarted his latest caper, a stand up comedy set at…
May 6, 2019 Camp Crystal Lake Closes After Seven Disastrous Summers Camp Crystal Lake Closes After Seven Disastrous Summers CRYSTAL LAKE, N.J. — After over a half a decade of calamity and a body count in the triple digits, historic Camp Crystal Lake has…
May 2, 2019 OPINION: It’s Called a Die OPINION: It’s Called a Die Hey wait a minute, why is this labelled as an opinion piece? It absolutely is called a die. This is not a matter of opinion.…
March 25, 2019 Mueller Report Post-Credits Scene EXPLAINED Mueller Report Post-Credits Scene EXPLAINED Coming off of a blockbuster opening weekend, The Mueller Report continues to dominate the conversation on social media and around water coolers nationwide. Now that…
March 16, 2019 Tinder Releases Official Tier List Tinder Releases Official Tier List LOS ANGELES — Tinder shocked the dating community with an official tier list released today, which places the application’s estimated 50 million users into a…
March 4, 2019 Uh Oh: Scrabble Opponent Knows the Weird Words Uh Oh: Scrabble Opponent Knows the Weird Words AMARILLO, Texas — An unassuming Scrabble game played with a relative’s new boyfriend reportedly led Jimmy Bachelor to a horrifying discovery: his opponent knew all…
February 23, 2019 PlayStation Classic Marked Down to Whatever You Have in Your Pocket PlayStation Classic Marked Down to Whatever You Have in Your Pocket NEW YORK — Sony has announced another price change to its underperforming PlayStation Classic console, lowering the price to whatever the consumer has in his…
February 22, 2019 Star Wars Universe Expanding Slower Than Scientists Initially Thought Star Wars Universe Expanding Slower Than Scientists Initially Thought SAN FRANCISCO — A group of scientists have released new findings that reveal that the Star Wars universe is expanding much more slowly than experts…
February 6, 2019 QWOP Runner Finishes 2015 Boston Marathon QWOP Runner Finishes 2015 Boston Marathon BOSTON — A runner best known for his appearance in a difficult viral flash game from 2008 has finally finished the 26.2 mile race he…
