August 21, 2020 Steve Bannon Arrested for Gobbling Up Skiers at Bottom of Hill Steve Bannon Arrested for Gobbling Up Skiers at Bottom of Hill WASHINGTON — Former Donald Trump advisor Steve Bannon was arrested yesterday on charges of reportedly devouring skiers at the bottom of a ski resort for…
August 20, 2020 Huge OST Fan Has Never Actually Finished Final Fantasy 6 Soundtrack Huge OST Fan Has Never Actually Finished Final Fantasy 6 Soundtrack PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Darcy Martin, an alleged superfan of original video game soundtracks, has revealed that he has never actually finished listening to the beloved…
August 16, 2020 Gamers Riot in Streets to Ensure Epic Gets Better Revenue Sharing Deal With Apple Gamers Riot in Streets to Ensure Epic Gets Better Revenue Sharing Deal With Apple SEATTLE — In response to the escalating tension between Apple and Epic, masses of angry gamers have taken to the streets to show support for…
August 15, 2020 Diddy Kong Accused of Using System of Barrels to Skip First Two Years of College Diddy Kong Accused of Using System of Barrels to Skip First Two Years of College EAST LANSING, Mich. — Diddy Kong is the latest celebrity to stand accused of using his celebrity status to bypass the rigors of higher education,…
August 8, 2020 Identical Tournament Fighters Grateful They Wore Different Pants Identical Tournament Fighters Grateful They Wore Different Pants OUTWORLD — Two participants, who by all accounts appeared to be exact replicants of one another, were reportedly grateful to have brought different colored pants…
August 4, 2020 Trump Boasts About Getting Through Professor Layton Games “Without Too Much Help” Trump Boasts About Getting Through Professor Layton Games “Without Too Much Help” WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump recently called into Hannity to boast about the minimal help he needed beating the entire series of Professor Layton games…
July 26, 2020 Jeopardy! Resumes Tapings With One Contestant Per Episode Jeopardy! Resumes Tapings With One Contestant Per Episode LOS ANGELES — Filming resumed on Jeopardy! this week, featuring a modified production that emphasizes social distancing, temporarily cutting the number of contestants down to…
July 21, 2020 Disgraced ‘Smash Bros.’ Player Announces Hiatus, Plans to Main Self for a Little While Disgraced ‘Smash Bros.’ Player Announces Hiatus, Plans to Main Self for a Little While SEATTLE — Tyler Wendell, the latest pro Super Smash Bros. player accused of sexual misconduct, has announced that he will be taking some time off…
July 21, 2020 Government Expected to Issue Second Stimulus Check to Help Americans Pay for $70 PS5 Games Government Expected to Issue Second Stimulus Check to Help Americans Pay for $70 PS5 Games WASHINGTON — The United States government is expected to announce a second relief package soon, one that will reportedly include provisions for the upcoming $70…
