Mark Roebuck

Guy Who Was Just Talking About Taking Huge Shit Keeps Getting Facebook Ads for Anthem

OKLAHOMA CITY — Local bathroom occupant Dan Corrigan has reportedly been plagued by incessant social media ads for Anthem, EA’s…

4 years ago

Zack Snyder Launches OnlyHaters Account

LOS ANGELES — Polarizing filmmaker Zack Snyder has announced a new account on the OnlyHaters service, which allows devoted detractors…

4 years ago

New Warzone Update Lets You Avoid War Entirely if You Find Enough Cash

ENCINO, Calif. — The most recent update to the Call of Duty: Warzone lets players permanently escape participating in ground…

4 years ago

Key Component of Gameplay Discovered Most of the Way Through Playthrough

DALLAS — Griffin Ross, 35, was most of the way through a first time playthrough of a game when he…

4 years ago

Nintendo Reveals Mario’s Full Canonical Name to be Mario Mario Mario Mario Mario Mario-Mario

KYOTO, Japan —  Nintendo sent shockwaves through the gaming industry today as they announced that their iconic mascot Mario’s canonical…

4 years ago

Here Is Everything We Know So Far About 1996’s Nintendo 64

Released to much acclaim and commercial success back in 1996, the Nintendo 64 is a system that continues to captivate…

4 years ago

Dungeon Master Sneaks Few Real Dice in With Those Sex Ones

PITTSBURGH — A recent attempt at invigorating the intimacy of Dana Boyer’s relationship with an avid role-playing fanatic ended horribly…

4 years ago

Gamer Presents Detailed Plan to Fix Vastly Successful Game

CARY, N.C. — A disgruntled but loyal Fortnite player has offered an unsolicited 14-point plan to completely fix the most…

4 years ago

Apple Announces Twenty Dollar Bill That Will Cost Fifty Dollars

SEATTLE — Apple’s latest addition to its signature line of products was revealed today, an American twenty dollar bill whose…

4 years ago