December 19, 2020 PS4 With ‘Cyberpunk’ Downloaded Listed on eBay Just In Case Anyone’s Stupid Enough to Go for That PS4 With ‘Cyberpunk’ Downloaded Listed on eBay Just In Case Anyone’s Stupid Enough to Go for That DALLAS — Local gamer Carter Evans has reportedly listed his PS4 console containing a digital download of the now-delisted Cyberpunk 2077 on eBay just in…
December 7, 2020 Review: ‘Cyberpunk: 2077’ Is a Perfect Game, Is What I Must Say to Make Sure the Abused Workers Get Their Bonuses Review: ‘Cyberpunk: 2077’ Is a Perfect Game, Is What I Must Say to Make Sure the Abused Workers Get Their Bonuses Brutal, crunch-filled development cycles have become an unfortunate staple of major AAA video games. The latest perpetrator of this is CD Projekt Red, the illustrious…
December 4, 2020 Man Who Eats, Sleeps, and Breathes Video Games Advised by Doctor to Stop Doing That Man Who Eats, Sleeps, and Breathes Video Games Advised by Doctor to Stop Doing That BOSTON — Urgently advising the at-risk man to change his dangerous lifestyle immediately, a doctor at Massachusetts General Hospital advised patient William Shelton to stop…
December 1, 2020 NASA Announces That You Won’t Be Able to Play ‘Boktai’ Anymore After the Sun Dies NASA Announces That You Won’t Be Able to Play ‘Boktai’ Anymore After the Sun Dies WASHINGTON — Confirming the inevitable circumstances that will eventually come to pass throughout our solar system, scientists at NASA headquarters confirmed in a press conference…
November 27, 2020 IGN Content Team Announces Mandatory Crunch To Release ‘Cyberpunk 2077’ Guide On Time IGN Content Team Announces Mandatory Crunch To Release ‘Cyberpunk 2077’ Guide On Time SAN FRANCISCO — In an effort to keep pace with the expectations their millions of devoted readers, the gaming news website IGN announced yesterday that…
November 26, 2020 Surprise Nintendo Direct Announces That You Can Play ‘Breath of the Wild’ Again Any Time You Want Surprise Nintendo Direct Announces That You Can Play ‘Breath of the Wild’ Again Any Time You Want KYOTO — Startling and delighting fans who had been starved for exciting announcements from the company, Nintendo announced in a surprise Nintendo Direct presentation today…
November 23, 2020 Video Game Enemies Circulate Anonymous Spreadsheet to Share Max HP and Equipment Info Video Game Enemies Circulate Anonymous Spreadsheet to Share Max HP and Equipment Info GRUGG’S CASTLE — In an effort to increase transparency about fair hiring practices and compensation, a group of video game enemies employed as guards at…
November 18, 2020 Gamer Asks Chipotle Employee Which Type of Beans Provide Better Stat Boost Gamer Asks Chipotle Employee Which Type of Beans Provide Better Stat Boost AUSTIN — Frustrating employees and other patrons and holding up the line behind him with his questions, a local gamer asked a Chipotle employee taking…
November 17, 2020 Alarming Daily Screen Time Report Doesn’t Include TV or Computer Monitor Alarming Daily Screen Time Report Doesn’t Include TV or Computer Monitor SARASOTA, Fla. — Straining his eyes while scrolling through the report to make sure he was understanding things right, distraught man and technology addict Antonio…
