Jordan Breeding

Man Willing to Free Aliens From Base Before Children From Cages

CALIENTE, Nev. — Subreddit moderator for r/RealAliens Devin Byam told sources Friday that, while he would absolutely be willing to…

5 years ago

New Board Game Uses All Your Other Unopened Board Games as Resource Tokens

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — Fantasy Flight Games released a highly anticipated new board game this week, titled Storage Worlds, which features…

6 years ago

Will I Understand John Wick 3 If I Haven’t Grasped Object Permanence?

I know what you’re thinking and, yes, I am a baby. Let’s get past that. It’s fair to wonder whether…

6 years ago

Game of Thrones Finale to Kill Off Millions of HBO Subscriptions

NEW YORK — In response to viewer complaints HBO had become too reluctant to dispatch high-profile characters on Game of…

6 years ago

New Tax on Violent Video Games Encourages Kids to Get Outside, Kill Real People for Once

PHILADELPHIA — The Pennsylvania State Legislature introduced a bill this week proposing an additional tax on violent video games, in…

6 years ago

Every Red Dead Redemption 2 Tombstone to Feature Names of Real Developers Who Died During Production

NEW YORK — Emaciated Rockstar Games’ programmer, Cassie Collier, revealed to Kotaku writer Jason Schreier that every tombstone in the…

6 years ago

Inventor of USB Unintentionally Buried Upside Down

ASHLAND, Ore. — A throng of mourners were reportedly horrified yesterday when it was revealed that Ajay Bhatt, inventor of…

6 years ago

New Steam Guidelines Allow Everything Except Half-Life 3

BELLEVUE, Wash. — In response to a number of controversial games being sold on their store, Valve has updated its…

6 years ago

Study Finds 100% Correlation Between Winning Board Games and Irresistible Sex Appeal

DENVER — Scientists have announced the discovery of a clear, 100% correlation between the stunning board game skill of sophomore…

7 years ago