Grant Mulitz

Grant Mulitz

Coup Player Clearly Lying About Being Your FriendCoup Player Clearly Lying About Being Your Friend

Coup Player Clearly Lying About Being Your Friend

BOSTON — Suspecting that one of your card-playing guests obviously cannot be an Ambassador or the Contessa, game night sources…

5 years ago
Museum of Natural History Acquires 4-Million Year Old Dry BonesMuseum of Natural History Acquires 4-Million Year Old Dry Bones

Museum of Natural History Acquires 4-Million Year Old Dry Bones

NEW YORK — Touting the new exhibit as a magnificent specimen of Koopa Troopa ancestry, the American Museum of Natural…

5 years ago
Gamer’s Health Care Plan Mainly Jumping Head First Into Red Heart Logo Outside CVSGamer’s Health Care Plan Mainly Jumping Head First Into Red Heart Logo Outside CVS

Gamer’s Health Care Plan Mainly Jumping Head First Into Red Heart Logo Outside CVS

DULUTH, Minn. — Claiming it’s been the cheapest and most accessible health power-up since getting kicked off of his parents’…

5 years ago
Study: 85% of Christians Still Do Not Believe Humans Evolved From Donkey KongStudy: 85% of Christians Still Do Not Believe Humans Evolved From Donkey Kong

Study: 85% of Christians Still Do Not Believe Humans Evolved From Donkey Kong

WASHINGTON — According to a nationwide survey conducted by the Pew Research Center, an overwhelming 85% of Christians do not…

5 years ago
Cool Black Car With Neon Green Accents Must Be Owner’s Gaming CarCool Black Car With Neon Green Accents Must Be Owner’s Gaming Car

Cool Black Car With Neon Green Accents Must Be Owner’s Gaming Car

NEW YORK —  Using words like “pro,” “premium,” and “racing-style,” sources have confirmed that the black 2015 Chevy Camaro with…

5 years ago
Disney Breeds Dozens of New Frog Species to Expand National Geographic Streaming ContentDisney Breeds Dozens of New Frog Species to Expand National Geographic Streaming Content

Disney Breeds Dozens of New Frog Species to Expand National Geographic Streaming Content

BURBANK, Calif. — Stating their intent to dramatically increase the wildlife channel’s Disney+ presence, the Walt Disney Company announced today…

5 years ago
35 Year-Old Man Still Sees Pediatrician With N64 in Waiting Room35 Year-Old Man Still Sees Pediatrician With N64 in Waiting Room

35 Year-Old Man Still Sees Pediatrician With N64 in Waiting Room

KANSAS CITY — 35-year-old Peter Brydon has been seeing family pediatrician Dr. Richard Cohen, who has had a Nintendo 64…

5 years ago
Review: This Super Mario Plush Toy Could Never Beat Having a Real Plumber Live In Your HouseReview: This Super Mario Plush Toy Could Never Beat Having a Real Plumber Live In Your House

Review: This Super Mario Plush Toy Could Never Beat Having Real Plumber Live In Your House

The other day while walking through the toy section at Target, I saw a little plush toy of the iconic…

5 years ago
Pikachu Overcome by Own Mortality Realizing He Will One Day Die and Become DuskullPikachu Overcome by Own Mortality Realizing He Will One Day Die and Become Duskull

Pikachu Overcome by Own Mortality Realizing He Will One Day Die and Become Duskull

JOHTO — Contemplating its afterlife for the first time in his life following a fierce battle, a local Pikachu fell…

6 years ago