tv

Rich People Greenlight 14 New Shows About Poor People

LOS ANGELES — The wealthy owners of the most popular television networks and streaming services have previewed their fall slate…

3 years ago

Man Gets 4 Episodes Into WandaVision Before Realizing He’s Actually Watching Frasier

MADISON, Wisc. — Local Marvel fan and notorious dumbass Bailey Lynch was reportedly bamboozled into watching multiple episodes of 1993's…

3 years ago

‘I Hunger for More Movies’ Bellows Minotaur Living Beneath Netflix Headquarters

LOS GATOS, Calif. — The grotesque monster living under Netflix cried out in hunger this morning, desperate for more mid-budget…

3 years ago

If You Think All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers, You’re Fucking Idiot

There’s an article going around today, making the ridiculous argument that all TV remotes should actually be gaming controllers. I…

3 years ago

It’s Time to Admit That All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers

As our technology gets better and better, people become attached to the familiar. Old interfaces become the preferred, retro designs…

3 years ago

Loving Couple Looking to Adopt New TV Show

ANCHORAGE, Ala. — Local couple Alice and Mark Holland are reportedly looking to adopt a new television, bringing it into…

3 years ago

Pirate Bay Salvages What It Can From Wreck of Quibi

LOS ANGELES — Members of The Pirate Bay took to the cyber seas to salvage the wreckage of disgraced short-form…

4 years ago

Scientists Warn Die Hard Simpsons Fans Could Only Like One Season By 2024

AMSTERDAM — Leading climate scientists have made a startling announcement, alleging that passionate fan enthusiasm for The Simpsons could dwindle…

4 years ago

CBS Hires Young Aspiring Writer to Jiggle the Ethernet Cable When the WiFi Cuts Out

NEW YORK — CBS Studios has reportedly hired aspiring television writer Taylor Johnson, 28, to jiggle the ethernet cable or…

4 years ago