speedrun

Porn Parody ‘Girls Done Quick’ Not Particularly PopularPorn Parody ‘Girls Done Quick’ Not Particularly Popular

Porn Parody ‘Girls Done Quick’ Not Particularly Popular

LOS ANGELES — Girls Done Quick, a new livestreamed porn parody of the hit video game convention Games Done Quick…

4 years ago
Speedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm ValidSpeedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm Valid

Speedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm Valid

SACRAMENTO — Video game speedrunner Ashton Clemens insisted that a significant portion of his girlfriend’s orgasms were completed incorrectly, arguing…

4 years ago
Ocasio-Cortez Given Speedrun Slot at DNCOcasio-Cortez Given Speedrun Slot at DNC

Ocasio-Cortez Given Speedrun Slot at DNC

MILWAUKEE — The Democratic National Committee has granted Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez a “speedrun” slot at tonight’s convention to show off…

5 years ago
Video Game Speedrunner Changes Boyfriend’s Language to Japanese to Get Through Argument QuickerVideo Game Speedrunner Changes Boyfriend’s Language to Japanese to Get Through Argument Quicker

Video Game Speedrunner Changes Boyfriend’s Language to Japanese to Get Through Argument Quicker

TAMPA, Fla. — Local video game speedrunner Lulu Gardner reportedly changed her boyfriend’s language to Japanese in order to get…

5 years ago
Hand-Washing Speedruns Condemned by World Health OrganizationHand-Washing Speedruns Condemned by World Health Organization

Hand-Washing Speedruns Condemned by World Health Organization

ATWATER, Ohio — Following a recent days-long conference focused on the COVID-19 outbreak held in Helsinki, Denmark, members of the…

5 years ago
Unhinged Maniac Rigs NES to Explode If SMB3 Speedrunner Lets Mario Drop Below P-SpeedUnhinged Maniac Rigs NES to Explode If SMB3 Speedrunner Lets Mario Drop Below P-Speed

Unhinged Maniac Rigs NES to Explode If SMB3 Speedrunner Lets Mario Drop Below P-Speed

ORLANDO, Fla. — Sending waves of terror rippling throughout the streamer’s Twitch chat, an unhinged maniac rigged an NES to…

5 years ago
Useless Toddler Misses ‘Putt-Putt Saves the Zoo’ Speedrun Record by 7 Months, 23 DaysUseless Toddler Misses ‘Putt-Putt Saves the Zoo’ Speedrun Record by 7 Months, 23 Days

Useless Toddler Misses ‘Putt-Putt Saves the Zoo’ Speedrun Record by 7 Months, 23 Days

PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Disgraced gamer Jake Marglous, 2, wrapped up his latest non-TAS speedrun of Putt-Putt Saves the Zoo earlier…

6 years ago
Lonely Man Speedruns CalzoneLonely Man Speedruns Calzone

Lonely Man Speedruns Calzone

BROOKLYN, N.Y. —  Displaying remarkable skill and reflexes, Brett Echelson livestreamed a complete speedrun of a calzone from his neighborhood…

7 years ago
Speedrun Streamer Sets New Record Time Explaining What That Means to Grandpa During Christmas DinnerSpeedrun Streamer Sets New Record Time Explaining What That Means to Grandpa During Christmas Dinner

Speedrun Streamer Sets New Record Time Explaining What That Means to Grandpa During Christmas Dinner

BONNER SPRINGS, Kan. – After an innocuous attempt at small talk by his grandfather Frank, speedrunning Twitch streamer Grady Millward…

7 years ago