March 29, 2020 Christian Mothers Agree It’s Actually Pretty Neat How ‘Doom Eternal’ Updated Its Combat System to Discourage Camping Christian Mothers Agree It’s Actually Pretty Neat How ‘Doom Eternal’ Updated Its Combat System to Discourage Camping SHEBOYGAN, Wisc. — In an impromptu meeting reacting to the release of the latest game in the controversial Satanic-themed first-person shooter franchise, a coalition of…
March 8, 2020 Christian YouTuber Reminds Peers That Algorithm Works in Mysterious Ways Christian YouTuber Reminds Peers That Algorithm Works in Mysterious Ways RICHMOND, Va. — Christian YouTuber LEViticus has posted a controversial video reminding peers that the YouTube algorithm works in mysterious ways and that it must…
February 28, 2020 Study: 85% of Christians Still Do Not Believe Humans Evolved From Donkey Kong Study: 85% of Christians Still Do Not Believe Humans Evolved From Donkey Kong WASHINGTON — According to a nationwide survey conducted by the Pew Research Center, an overwhelming 85% of Christians do not accept the scientific truth that…
August 2, 2018 Bible Scholars Reveal Jesus Christ Played Shit-Ton of Mario Party Bible Scholars Reveal Jesus Christ Played Shit-Ton of Mario Party VATICAN CITY — Bible Scholars have determined that Jesus Christ’s hand injuries, previously thought to have been caused by crucifixion, were actually the result of…
July 24, 2018 God Resigns After Discovery of Old Testament God Resigns After Discovery of Old Testament HEAVEN — Succumbing to public outcry after the shocking discovery of an Old Testament written by Himself, God, the Father Almighty creator of Heaven and…
November 27, 2017 IRS Officially Recognizes EA as Religion After Accepting Millions of Dollars From Customers on Faith IRS Officially Recognizes EA as Religion After Accepting Millions of Dollars From Customers on Faith WASHINGTON — The IRS announced today, that based on a litany, video game company Electronic Arts will now be officially recognized as a religion. The…
