April 8, 2020 World 1-1 Koopa Claims to be World 3-6 Para-Koopa On Dating App World 1-1 Koopa Claims to be World 3-6 Para-Koopa On Dating App MUSHROOM KINGDOM — Continuing the trend of deceitful users of the Mushroom Kingdom’s dominant dating app, Mushd, a love-seeking Goomba named Sandra, 26, recently met…
April 6, 2020 Man Shocked to Discover Girlfriend Entirely CGI After Watching VFX Breakdown Man Shocked to Discover Girlfriend Entirely CGI After Watching VFX Breakdown FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Local boyfriend Steven Owen was shocked to discover that his girlfriend of three years was entirely CGI after watching a visual…
March 27, 2020 Boyfriend Can’t Find the Crit Boyfriend Can’t Find the Crit BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local woman Anita Harrison expressed disappointment during a game of Dungeons and Dragons when her boyfriend Steven Baker was once again unable…
March 8, 2020 Boyfriend Down to Two Stocks After Being Knocked Off Bed Boyfriend Down to Two Stocks After Being Knocked Off Bed ALBANY, N.Y. — Local boyfriend Dennis McElris is reportedly down to just two stocks after being knocked off the bed by his sleeping girlfriend Jennifer…
February 14, 2020 QA Tester Also Good at Finding Flaws in Friend’s New Boyfriend QA Tester Also Good at Finding Flaws in Friend’s New Boyfriend ROCKVILLE, Md. — Gabriel Callahan, a Maryland local and QA Tester at Bethesda Softworks, is also pretty good at finding flaws in his friend’s new…
July 12, 2019 Man Equips Lvl 4 Gear for Lvl 30 Date Man Equips Lvl 4 Gear for Lvl 30 Date RICHMOND, Va. — Mistakenly assuming that his ordinary equipment would be adequate to see him through the encounter, IT specialist Alejandro Mano, 24, made a…
May 2, 2019 Woman Starting to Warm Up to Man Who Brings Her Two Bars of Solid Gold Every Week Woman Starting to Warm Up to Man Who Brings Her Two Bars of Solid Gold Every Week STARDEW VALLEY — Local resident and gadget builder Maru has reportedly begun to feel a new sense of intimacy toward the young man who has…
April 26, 2019 Nerd Couple Has Klingon-Themed Divorce Nerd Couple Has Klingon-Themed Divorce CLACKAMAS, Ore. — Citing irreconcilable differences, local Trekkies Paul and Lisa Ash went into painstaking detail to make sure that the dissolving of their ten…
September 12, 2018 5 Scott Pilgrim Quotes That Nice Boy Over There Will Use to Justify Abusing You 5 Scott Pilgrim Quotes That Nice Boy Over There Will Use to Justify Abusing You Do you love comic books? Here are the top five Scott Pilgrim quotes you can expect that unassuming “male feminist” rocking a Mac DeMarco shirt…
