March 25, 2019 Mueller Report Post-Credits Scene EXPLAINED Mueller Report Post-Credits Scene EXPLAINED Coming off of a blockbuster opening weekend, The Mueller Report continues to dominate the conversation on social media and around water coolers nationwide. Now that…
March 19, 2019 I’m Voting For Bernie Sanders Unless Another Candidate Proves They Have More Swords Than Him I’m Voting For Bernie Sanders Unless Another Candidate Proves They Have More Swords Than Him The 2020 Democratic Primary race is shaping up to be a cutthroat march to the nomination. Well, it was, until I learned that Bernie Sanders…
March 12, 2019 Elizabeth Warren Signs Up for Abstergo Project to Experience Life of Her Native American Ancestor Elizabeth Warren Signs Up for Abstergo Project to Experience Life of Her Native American Ancestor NEW YORK — Presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren invited press today to watch her enter into an Animus provided by Abstergo Industries so that she could…
March 7, 2019 Civilization VI Player Weighing Foreign Policy Decisions More Heavily Than Actual Leader of United States Civilization VI Player Weighing Foreign Policy Decisions More Heavily Than Actual Leader of United States PHILADELPHIA – Local gamer Jamie Stanfield was shocked when she realized 11 months into a marathon-speed playthrough of Civilization VI that she was spending more…
February 21, 2019 Opinion: My Squad Won in Apex Legends. Here’s Why I Refuse to Go to the White House Opinion: My Squad Won in Apex Legends. Here’s Why I Refuse to Go to the White House After days of practice and preparation, my teammates finally reached the mountaintop and got our first squad win. However, because I disagree with the politics…
February 12, 2019 Tom Cruise Announces He Will Be Running in 2020 Tom Cruise Announces He Will Be Running in 2020 LOS ANGELES — Tom Cruise released a statement today, after much speculation, confirming he would be running in the year 2020. “I decided it was…
January 27, 2019 Democrats in Disarray After President Trump Tweets That US Constitution Isn’t Canon Democrats in Disarray After President Trump Tweets That US Constitution Isn’t Canon WASHINGTON — The newly-emboldened Democratic Party is in disarray today after President Trump announced on social media that the United States Constitution is no longer…
December 5, 2018 Super Smash Bros. Ultimate to Be Delayed One Month Due to George H.W. Bush Funeral Super Smash Bros. Ultimate to Be Delayed One Month Due to George H.W. Bush Funeral KYOTO, Japan — To honor the death of former U.S. President George H.W. Bush, Nintendo has announced that Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for the Switch,…
November 17, 2018 Opinion: It’s Time for a Gamer President Opinion: It’s Time for a Gamer President Our country is in political turmoil as we look to our leaders and see no one who will rise up to the challenge of defeating…
