pandemic

Pandemic to Auto-Renew on March 12thPandemic to Auto-Renew on March 12th

Pandemic to Auto-Renew on March 12th

EARTH — The entire world was devastated to learn Friday that, because of a general oversight on humanity’s part, the…

4 years ago
America Unsure If Pandemic Is One of Those Scripted Fights You’re Supposed to LoseAmerica Unsure If Pandemic Is One of Those Scripted Fights You’re Supposed to Lose

America Unsure If Pandemic Is One of Those Scripted Fights You’re Supposed to Lose

WASHINGTON — As the infection rates and death counts throughout the nation continue to slowly creep upwards, citizens throughout the…

4 years ago
COVID-19 Gears Up for Another Double-XP WeekendCOVID-19 Gears Up for Another Double-XP Weekend

COVID-19 Gears Up for Another Double-XP Weekend

ATLANTA — Scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have confirmed that the COVID-19 virus is gearing up…

4 years ago
Skyrim ‘Pandemic Update’ Increases Shout Damage by 1,000 PercentSkyrim ‘Pandemic Update’ Increases Shout Damage by 1,000 Percent

Skyrim ‘Pandemic Update’ Increases Shout Damage by 1,000 Percent

ROCKVILLE, Md. — Bethesda Softworks announced a new “Pandemic Update” for their hit RPG, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, in…

5 years ago
Coronavirus Experiences Double-XP Weekend in Re-Opened StatesCoronavirus Experiences Double-XP Weekend in Re-Opened States

Coronavirus Experiences Double-XP Weekend in Re-Opened States

ATLANTA — Scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention are confirming that, following several states’ pushes to reopen,…

5 years ago
Quarantined Gamer Dangerously Close to Finishing GameQuarantined Gamer Dangerously Close to Finishing Game

Quarantined Gamer Dangerously Close to Finishing Game

RESTON, Va. — With America approaching a third month of quarantine due to COVID-19, gamer James Batson is reportedly battling…

5 years ago
Community Applauds at 3 a.m. Every Day to Celebrate Gaming Heroes Who Don’t Go OutsideCommunity Applauds at 3 a.m. Every Day to Celebrate Gaming Heroes Who Don’t Go Outside

Community Applauds at 3 a.m. Every Day to Celebrate Gaming Heroes Who Don’t Go Outside

NEW YORK — The residents of New York City have begun applauding out their windows every single day at three…

5 years ago
Irresponsible Villagers Still Attending Concerts During PandemicIrresponsible Villagers Still Attending Concerts During Pandemic

Irresponsible Villagers Still Attending Concerts During Pandemic

BIG SKY ISLAND — Residents of a single-island community in the remote ocean are defying the government’s orders for social…

5 years ago
Laid Off Gamer Plays Switch in Bathroom Just to Feel Normal AgainLaid Off Gamer Plays Switch in Bathroom Just to Feel Normal Again

Laid Off Gamer Plays Switch in Bathroom Just to Feel Normal Again

LINCOLN, Neb. — After being laid off from his job at a regional cardboard box supply company last week, local…

5 years ago