February 12, 2019 Kid Whose Uncle Actually Works at Nintendo Ostracized at School Kid Whose Uncle Actually Works at Nintendo Ostracized at School MIDDLEBURY, Vt. — Local 6th grader David Kammer has been shunned by his classmates at Middlebury Union Middle School after repeated attempts to explain that…
January 25, 2019 Kensuke Tanabe Backtracking Through Nintendo Offices to Find Key That Lets Him Continue Metroid Prime 4 Development Kensuke Tanabe Backtracking Through Nintendo Offices to Find Key That Lets Him Continue Metroid Prime 4 Development KYOTO, Japan — The development of Metroid Prime 4 has reportedly stalled after series producer Kensuke Tanabe discovered he was missing an important key that…
January 20, 2019 College Roommates Try to Save Relationship by Having a GameCube College Roommates Try to Save Relationship by Having a GameCube SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Four college students at Syracuse University have reportedly attempted to neglect their own shortcomings as roommates and tried to salvage their relationships…
January 6, 2019 Nintendo Says They Haven’t Gotten Any Faxes Complaining About Their Online Service Nintendo Says They Haven’t Gotten Any Faxes Complaining About Their Online Service REDMOND, Wash. — Nintendo executives expressed shock upon learning fans do not like their online service because they reportedly have not received any complaints from…
December 24, 2018 Teary-Eyed Mom Reminds Children This May Be Last Christmas With 3DS Teary-Eyed Mom Reminds Children This May Be Last Christmas With 3DS PATERSON, N.J. — Cindy Aimes held back tears while reminding her children during a family meal that their once-beloved Nintendo 3DS won’t be with them…
December 7, 2018 Release of Smash Bros. Ultimate Marks Most Eventful December 7th in History Release of Smash Bros. Ultimate Marks Most Eventful December 7th in History HONOLULU, Hawaii — Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for the Nintendo Switch was released today, the latest installment in the long-running fighting game series and the…
December 7, 2018 Guy Who Doesn’t Have $60 Right Now Somehow Manages to Buy Switch, Smash Bros, Two Pro Controllers, and Ethernet Adapter Guy Who Doesn’t Have $60 Right Now Somehow Manages to Buy Switch, Smash Bros, Two Pro Controllers, and Ethernet Adapter TUCSON, Ariz. — Local gamer Pierce Roderick has reportedly gathered enough capital to purchase all of the necessary equipment for him to properly play the…
December 5, 2018 Super Smash Bros. Ultimate to Be Delayed One Month Due to George H.W. Bush Funeral Super Smash Bros. Ultimate to Be Delayed One Month Due to George H.W. Bush Funeral KYOTO, Japan — To honor the death of former U.S. President George H.W. Bush, Nintendo has announced that Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for the Switch,…
November 21, 2018 Nintendo Lets Terminally Ill Fan Work 14 Hour Days Coding New Game Nintendo Lets Terminally Ill Fan Work 14 Hour Days Coding New Game KYOTO, Japan — In an incredibly gracious move, Nintendo has granted a terminally ill fan’s last wish of appearing in a game by allowing him…
