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Indie Band Named After NES Game Also Plays Like ShitIndie Band Named After NES Game Also Plays Like Shit

Indie Band Named After NES Game Also Plays Like Shit

BLACK EARTH, Wisc. — Local garage band The Cheetahmen has come under fire due to the fact that, much like…

6 years ago
Nintendo Online Service Requires Players to Call Reggie Fils-Aimé Every WeekNintendo Online Service Requires Players to Call Reggie Fils-Aimé Every Week

Nintendo Online Service Requires Players to Call Reggie Fils-Aimé Every Week

KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo announced today that their recently launched online service now includes yet another contingency: Switch owners will be…

6 years ago
Man Returns to Find Roasted Chicken He Hid Inside Barrel Broken Into, EatenMan Returns to Find Roasted Chicken He Hid Inside Barrel Broken Into, Eaten

Man Returns to Find Roasted Chicken He Hid Inside Barrel Broken Into, Eaten

NEW YORK — While attempting to recover a full chicken dinner sealed inside a wooden barrel at an earlier date,…

7 years ago
Our Duck Hunt Remake Will Feature Gorgeous 60fps Animation, A Shitload More DucksOur Duck Hunt Remake Will Feature Gorgeous 60fps Animation, A Shitload More Ducks

Our Duck Hunt Remake Will Feature Gorgeous 60fps Animation, A Shitload More Ducks

Hey gamers, are you tired of your childhoods being cashed in on by way of cheap reissues and “special” editions?…

7 years ago
Mini SEGA Saturn Still Very Much in StockMini SEGA Saturn Still Very Much in Stock

Mini SEGA Saturn Still Very Much in Stock

  SEGA has issued the following press release reminding holiday shoppers that there is no shortage of their Mini Saturn…

7 years ago
Study Finds 80% of NES Characters Believe Earth is Flat, Only Moves to the RightStudy Finds 80% of NES Characters Believe Earth is Flat, Only Moves to the Right

Study Finds 80% of NES Characters Believe Earth is Flat, Only Moves to the Right

BERKELEY, Calif. — A controversial U.C. Berkeley study found that 80% of classic Nintendo characters believe that the Earth is…

7 years ago
Kinky Cartridge Loves When You Spit in Its MouthKinky Cartridge Loves When You Spit in Its Mouth

Kinky Cartridge Loves When You Spit in Its Mouth

GLEN ROCK, N.J. — Alan Burton was shocked to find that his copy of Bad Dudes for the NES would…

8 years ago
Black Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item ShopBlack Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item Shop

Black Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item Shop

CORNELIA, World A — A heated confrontation took place at the item shop earlier today, involving a black mage who…

8 years ago
NES Classic Edition Lets You Play for One Hour, Then It’s Your Little Brother’s TurnNES Classic Edition Lets You Play for One Hour, Then It’s Your Little Brother’s Turn

NES Classic Edition Lets You Play for One Hour, Then It’s Your Little Brother’s Turn

REDMOND, Wash. -- Nintendo’s NES Classic drew sharp reactions from critics and fans alike this week with the announcement of…

8 years ago