December 2, 2020 Leprechaun Assures Wife That Mortal Kombat Is Going to Call Any Day Now Leprechaun Assures Wife That Mortal Kombat Is Going to Call Any Day Now MAPLE GROVE, Minn. — The titular star of the Leprechaun series of films has reportedly been assuring his family that the developers of Mortal Kombat…
November 9, 2020 Horrified Mario Regrets Triple Jumping Into H.R. Giger Painting Horrified Mario Regrets Triple Jumping Into H.R. Giger Painting METRO KINGDOM — Local adventurer Mario Mario is allegedly trapped inside an unsettling painting by modern artist H.R. Giger after having jumped 12-feet into the…
September 29, 2020 New Facebook Tab Switches to Classic Mode If Clicked, But Somebody You Don’t Know Will Die New Facebook Tab Switches to Classic Mode If Clicked, But Somebody You Don’t Know Will Die SAN FRANCISCO — Facebook has debuted a new feature that allows users to revert their profiles to Facebook Classic for 48 hours by clicking a…
July 8, 2020 Disgusting: Little Baby Bitch Boy Coward Gamer Brightens Horror Settings So Symbol Still Visible Disgusting: Little Baby Bitch Boy Coward Gamer Brightens Horror Settings So Symbol Still Visible PHILADELPHIA — Local game enthusiast and known little baby bitch boy Shawn Hughes began his playthrough of The Last of Us Part 2 Saturday, reportedly…
May 26, 2020 Dead by Daylight DLC Adds Iconic ‘80s Monster Ronald Reagan Dead by Daylight DLC Adds Iconic ‘80s Monster Ronald Reagan MONTREAL — Developer Behaviour Interactive announced the next DLC pack for its horror game Dead by Daylight will expand the game’s list of classic monsters by…
April 10, 2020 Review: ‘Resident Evil 3’ Failed to Deliver One Scare After We Muted It and Turned on All the Lights Review: ‘Resident Evil 3’ Failed to Deliver One Scare After We Muted It and Turned on All the Lights Resident Evil 3 is the latest remake in the sprawling, allegedly scary franchise, and, on the surface, picks up where last year’s masterful Resident Evil…
June 28, 2019 Horror Director Can’t Remember If His Movie Is in the ‘Conjuring’ Universe or Not Horror Director Can’t Remember If His Movie Is in the ‘Conjuring’ Universe or Not LOS ANGELES — Horror director Gary Dauberman recently spent another workday wondering if his horror film Annabelle Comes Home, was part of the Conjuring cinematic…
May 6, 2019 Camp Crystal Lake Closes After Seven Disastrous Summers Camp Crystal Lake Closes After Seven Disastrous Summers CRYSTAL LAKE, N.J. — After over a half a decade of calamity and a body count in the triple digits, historic Camp Crystal Lake has…
January 17, 2019 Gamer More Scared of Vibrating Dualshock on Coffee Table than Silent Hill Cutscene That Caused It Gamer More Scared of Vibrating Dualshock on Coffee Table than Silent Hill Cutscene That Caused It TULSA, Okla. — Alex Watson’s Dualshock 2 reportedly went “fucking postal” vibrating on the coffee table in front of him during a Silent Hill 2…
