games

Steam Announces Oddly Specific ‘Games You and Molly Used to Play Before You Broke Up’ Sale

BELLEVUE, Wash. — Online video game retailer Steam has announced an eerily particular sale, seemingly curated exclusively around games you…

4 years ago

5 Switch Games You Need to Play Before You Die, Which Will Be Soon!

The Nintendo Switch has been around for a few years now, but you only have so much time in your…

4 years ago

Nintendo Direct Leaves Gamer Excited About 14 Games He Won’t Buy When They Come Out

TUCSON, Ariz. —  A recent installment of Nintendo’s Direct series of videos showcasing upcoming software coming to their platform has…

4 years ago

Coming Soon: More Video Games and You Like It, Don’t You? You Sick Fuck

Between the Xbox Games Showcase, Sony’s “Future of Gaming” event, and the upcoming release of Cyberpunk 2077, we have a…

4 years ago

Food and Water Now Exclusive to Epic Games Store

CARY, N.C. — Building on their catalogue of exclusive video games, the Epic Games store announced a multi-billion dollar deal…

4 years ago

Government Expected to Issue Second Stimulus Check to Help Americans Pay for $70 PS5 Games

WASHINGTON — The United States government is expected to announce a second relief package soon, one that will reportedly include…

4 years ago

Historically Shit-Sucking Gamer Swears ‘Valorant’ Is Going to Be Different

GREENSBORO, N.C. — Local gamer Harry Olsen, who has sucked shit at every single video game he has ever played,…

5 years ago

160 Million Americans Added to Suspected Terrorist List

WASHINGTON — The United States government has added the over 160 million Americans that play video games to a growing…

5 years ago

Rockstar Games Posts Hastily Drawn 6 on Twitter to Distract People From Latest Controversy

NEW YORK — Hours after a new controversy about Rockstar Games became public knowledge, the video game company posted a…

5 years ago