gamer

Arby’s New Gamer Sandwich Uses N64 Cartridges as Buns

ATLANTA — Popular fast food chain Arby’s has debuted a new “Gamer Sandwich” menu item consisting of a quarter pound…

3 years ago

Vampire Requests Invite to Open Xbox Live Party

FORKS, Wash. — Local vampiric gamer FaNg DaNKula was seen requesting an invite to an open Xbox Live Party in…

3 years ago

Broken PC Transforms Hardcore Gamer Into Just Normal Run-of-the-Mill Bigot

ANN ARBOR, Mich. — While saving up to repair his broken gaming PC, local man Josh Quell underwent a transformation…

3 years ago

Gamer Increases Odds of Tinder Match by Holding Down-B While Swiping

ATHENS, Ohio — Single gamer Evan Hughes reportedly believes that holding down and B while swiping on Tinder increases his…

3 years ago

Vaccinated Gamer Unlocks ‘Social Gathering’ Skill Tree

NEW YORK — Local gamer Caroline Silva unlocked the ‘social gathering’ skill tree on her abilities menu exactly two weeks…

3 years ago

Mobile Gamer Discovers 16-Digit Cheat Code

HARTFORD, Conn. — Local mobile gamer Jeremy Jackson has drastically improved his performance in gacha game Legend of the Bravest…

3 years ago

Beware: If We Make Minimum Wage $15 Then People Won’t Need Two Jobs, Meaning They’ll Have Leisure Time, Meaning There Will Be More Gamers

The national debate over minimum wage has raged on in the United States ever since President Biden made it an…

3 years ago

Man Who Eats, Sleeps, and Breathes Video Games Advised by Doctor to Stop Doing That

BOSTON — Urgently advising the at-risk man to change his dangerous lifestyle immediately, a doctor at Massachusetts General Hospital advised…

3 years ago

Nintendo Direct Leaves Gamer Excited About 14 Games He Won’t Buy When They Come Out

TUCSON, Ariz. —  A recent installment of Nintendo’s Direct series of videos showcasing upcoming software coming to their platform has…

4 years ago