September 14, 2020 Gamer Can’t Help But Hear ‘Continue?’ Every Day When Waking Up Gamer Can’t Help But Hear ‘Continue?’ Every Day When Waking Up ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. ā Local gamer Stephen McLaughlin canāt help but hear the voice of the Super Smash Bros. Melee announcer saying āContinue?ā every single time…
September 13, 2020 Isle Delfino Residents Guessing at Political Message Behind New Banksy Piece Isle Delfino Residents Guessing at Political Message Behind New Banksy Piece ISLE DELFINO ā Residents of Isle Delfino were left shocked and amazed this week as a mysterious public art installation that appeared overnight was believed…
June 16, 2020 NYPD Sends Controller to Crime Lab After Officer Loses in Smash Bros NYPD Sends Controller to Crime Lab After Officer Loses in Smash Bros NEW YORK ā The NYPD confirmed today that they have launched an official investigation into the controller purchased at a local GameStop by policeman Steve…
May 24, 2020 Gamer Training Months for Melee Tournament Heartbroken Upon Discovering They Didnāt Mean āGodzilla: Destroy All Monsters Meleeā Gamer Training Months for Melee Tournament Heartbroken Upon Discovering They Didnāt Mean āGodzilla: Destroy All Monsters Meleeā JACKSONVILLE, Fla. ā Dedicated Godzilla: Destroy All Monsters Melee player Duncan Cooker was recently disappointed to realize that the āMeleeā tournament heād been preparing for…
March 9, 2020 Get It Together: Can You Remember What Case You Left Melee in Before Your Sleepover Devolves Into Chaos? Get It Together: Can You Remember What Case You Left Melee in Before Your Sleepover Devolves Into Chaos? Itās Friday, and you know what that means: the boys are coming over for a sleepover! Mom just tidied up the basement, youāve already picked…
May 29, 2019 36-Year-Old Gamer Practicing Every Day For Casual Smash Bros Match With Nephew at Family Get Together 36-Year-Old Gamer Practicing Every Day For Casual Smash Bros Match With Nephew at Family Get Together ROCHESTER, N.Y. ā Jimmy Feldman has reportedly been practicing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for three hours every single day after work in preparation for when…
May 27, 2019 Melee Player Canāt Believe Someone Would Just Throw Out Zenith CRT TV With Built-In VCR From 2005 Melee Player Canāt Believe Someone Would Just Throw Out Zenith CRT TV With Built-In VCR From 2005 PITTSBURGH ā Local Super Smash Bros. Melee player Robert Sheely stared in awe and confusion at a nearly fifteen-year-old Zenith CRT TV complete with a…
January 20, 2019 College Roommates Try to Save Relationship by Having a GameCube College Roommates Try to Save Relationship by Having a GameCube SYRACUSE, N.Y. ā Four college students at Syracuse University have reportedly attempted to neglect their own shortcomings as roommates and tried to salvage their relationships…
June 9, 2018 Purist Surgeon Refuses to Operate Surgery Robot With Anything but GameCube Controller Purist Surgeon Refuses to Operate Surgery Robot With Anything but GameCube Controller BOSTON ā Explaining that newer controllers donāt quite provide the same comfort or familiarity, surgeon Dr. Frank Powell said this morning that he refuses to…
