November 8, 2020 Donald Trump Decides to Buy PS5 After All Donald Trump Decides to Buy PS5 After All WASHINGTON â After initially claiming he was going to hold out until more exclusive next-gen titles became available, President Donald Trump has reversed his claim…
November 5, 2020 Gamer Tip: Your Vote Is Wasted If It’s Not Concentrated on a Blinking Weak Spot Gamer Tip: Your Vote Is Wasted If It’s Not Concentrated on a Blinking Weak Spot PENNSYLVANIA â Gamer consultants have advised the Trump and Biden campaigns that itâs pointless to spam votes in low-effect areas like California and Kentucky, when…
November 5, 2020 Gamer Sick of Two-Console System Gamer Sick of Two-Console System WASHINGTON â Local gamer Stephen Nelson exhaustedly told friends Wednesday night that he is done with participating in the antiquated two-console system forced on him…
November 3, 2020 Gamer Buys Both Nate Silver and Nate Gold Versions to Get Full Results Gamer Buys Both Nate Silver and Nate Gold Versions to Get Full Results ERIE, Pa. â Local gamer Glenn Rice reportedly purchased both Nate Silver and Nate Gold versions of the 2020 presidential election forecast in order to…
November 3, 2020 Jeffrey Toobin Announces He Failed âNo Nut Novemberâ Jeffrey Toobin Announces He Failed âNo Nut Novemberâ NEW YORK â New Yorker reporter Jeffrey Toobin announced on social media today that he failed the viral internet challenge to not ejaculate during the…
November 3, 2020 Guy Writing In âWaluigiâ for President Doesn’t Actually Want Waluigi to Be President Guy Writing In âWaluigiâ for President Doesn’t Actually Want Waluigi to Be President ROCHESTER, N.Y. â Local voter Martin Frost does not actually want video game character Waluigi to be president, despite writing him in under âpresidentâ on…
November 1, 2020 Horrible Goose Caught Scaring Voters Away From Early Voting Site Horrible Goose Caught Scaring Voters Away From Early Voting Site KEENE, Ky. â Several Keene residents have reported cases of voter intimidation at the small townâs early voting location, noting that the polls are being…
October 29, 2020 âAmerica Will Look Vastly Different After November,â Says Man Discussing âHyrule Warriorsâ Launch Day âAmerica Will Look Vastly Different After November,â Says Man Discussing âHyrule Warriorsâ Launch Day WASHINGTON â Warning his friends and loved ones of the coming weeks and months of uncertainty, local politico Philippe Cruz remarked today that America will…
March 18, 2020 Bernie Sanders’ Policies Would Take Away Americans’ Choice to Lower This Bridge for 200 Gems Bernie Sanders’ Policies Would Take Away Americans’ Choice to Lower This Bridge for 200 Gems In our political climate, there is no lack of problems to be solved. Climate change, student loan debt, trade disputes. Bernie Sanders offers big ideas…
