covid

GameStop Introduces Curbside PesteringGameStop Introduces Curbside Pestering

GameStop Introduces Curbside Pestering

GRAPEVINE, Texas — As the COVID-19 pandemic continues with no signs of slowing down, GameStop has announced that its patented…

5 years ago
Claudia Conway Reveals Her Mom Pretended to Have COVID to Play Crash Bandicoot 4Claudia Conway Reveals Her Mom Pretended to Have COVID to Play Crash Bandicoot 4

Claudia Conway Reveals Her Mom Pretended to Have COVID to Play Crash Bandicoot 4

WASHINGTON — TikTok sensation Claudia Conway released a series of bombshell videos today revealing that her mother and close Trump…

5 years ago
Local Wedding Linked to 3,500 DeathsLocal Wedding Linked to 3,500 Deaths

Local Wedding Linked to 3,500 Deaths

WESTEROS — Following an exhaustive contact tracing study, a recent Riverlands wedding has been linked to 3,500 deaths, sources report.…

5 years ago
Man Risks Life for Opportunity to Explain Tenet to GirlfriendMan Risks Life for Opportunity to Explain Tenet to Girlfriend

Man Risks Life for Opportunity to Explain Tenet to Girlfriend

CHICAGO — Cinephile Brad Reznik attended a showing of Tenet, despite dangers associated with the COVID-19 pandemic, for the opportunity…

5 years ago
Employees Returning to Work for First Time in Months Discover Office Overrun by WeedsEmployees Returning to Work for First Time in Months Discover Office Overrun by Weeds

Employees Returning to Work for First Time in Months Discover Office Overrun by Weeds

TAMPA, Fla. — Employees returning to the local offices of Seabass Accounting & Tax Services this week were reportedly shocked…

5 years ago
Fall Guys Griefer Just Misses Human ContactFall Guys Griefer Just Misses Human Contact

Fall Guys Griefer Just Misses Human Contact

CINCINNATI, Ohio — Fall Guys: Ultimate Knockout player Tim Williams insists that the only reason he grabs others at the…

5 years ago
President Trump Appoints Dr. Goomba Tower as New Head, Head, and Head of COVID-19 Task ForcePresident Trump Appoints Dr. Goomba Tower as New Head, Head, and Head of COVID-19 Task Force

President Trump Appoints Dr. Goomba Tower as New Head, Head, and Head of COVID-19 Task Force

WASHINGTON — President Trump announced this morning that he would be naming Dr. Goomba Tower as the new head, head,…

5 years ago
CDC Recommends All Americans Keep Audio Logs During Pandemic for Future Protagonists to Stumble UponCDC Recommends All Americans Keep Audio Logs During Pandemic for Future Protagonists to Stumble Upon

CDC Recommends All Americans Keep Audio Logs During Pandemic for Future Protagonists to Stumble Upon

WASHINGTON — At a press conference this afternoon, CDC Director Robert Redfield urged all American citizens to begin keeping audio…

5 years ago