controller

Nearly Unusable Controller Still in Rotation Because It Looks Cool

HUNTSVILLE, Texas — Roommates Audley Stoddard, Jay Heath, and Corwin Reed have announced their intention to continue regularly using a…

5 years ago

Unintuitive Controls Convenient Excuse for Sucking Real Bad at Game

LODI, N.J. — After consistently failing the same mission over and over, local gamer Josh Chung declared that unintuitive controls…

5 years ago

Strategy Guide: Press the ‘Start’ Button to Start the Game

Gatekeeping in the world of video games is an epidemic. It is our duty as those who are “in the…

5 years ago

Xbox Player Making Whole Performance Out of Adjusting to PS4 Controller

ASTORIA, N.Y. — Despite a litany of other explanations for his subpar performance across several local multiplayer games, local Xbox…

5 years ago

Gamer More Scared of Vibrating Dualshock on Coffee Table than Silent Hill Cutscene That Caused It

TULSA, Okla. — Alex Watson’s Dualshock 2 reportedly went “fucking postal” vibrating on the coffee table in front of him…

6 years ago

Juilliard Introduces Course Teaching Actors to Convincingly Hold Controllers

NEW YORK — The world-renowned Juilliard Academy for Performing Arts announced that it has created a new course specifically designed…

6 years ago

Team Ninja Invents One-Handed Controller for Dead or Alive Xtreme Franchise

TOKYO — Yosuke Hayashi, president of famed software developer Team Ninja, announced the production of a new controller specifically designed…

6 years ago

45 Dead After Disastrous Debut of Mad Catz Self-Driving Car

SAINT PAUL, Minn. — Tragedy struck today as the first public showcase of the self-driving car invented by infamous video…

6 years ago

Opinion: My Controller’s Being Weird

It is time for our nation to come together and agree that my controller is being weird as hell right…

6 years ago