comics

Professor X Unsure What to Do With Mutant Whose Only Power Is Knowing When Bob Seger Song Is Playing on Any Classic Rock Radio Station in America

NORTH SALEM, N.Y. — Professor Charles Xavier, headmaster at Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, is reportedly at a loss…

3 years ago

Sony Acquires Exclusive Rights to All Spiders and Men, Just to Be Safe

NEW YORK — Sony Entertainment has acquired exclusive rights to all depictions of arachnids and men in film, television, and…

4 years ago

Superman Banishes General Zod to Tucker Carlson Guest Box

METROPOLIS — After a brutal and bloody battle through the downtown section of the city, Superman defeated the ruthless General…

4 years ago

Man Expected to Remember What Happened in Comic Book He Read Month Ago

RIDGEWOOD, N.J. — Local comic book enthusiast Casey Little was frustrated and slightly offended that the writers of his favorite…

4 years ago

Gotham Rules Batman Can Only Break One Limb on Guy

GOTHAM CITY — Gotham City has passed a controversial new bill that would restrict famed vigilante crime fighter Batman to…

4 years ago

We Apologize For Publishing Darkseid’s Anti-Life Equation

We hear you.  This is a fragile point in history, where every voice matters. Particularly when those voices are screaming…

4 years ago

Superman Asks Waiter If There’s Kryptonite in His Meal

METROPOLIS — Local superhero Superman reportedly asked his waiter at a restaurant last night if there was any kryptonite in…

4 years ago

Frank Miller Brings Gritty Noir Sensibility to Niece’s Baby Shower

SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Iconic comic book author Frank Miller brought his trademark terse and pulpy style to his niece…

4 years ago

New Marvel Superhero ‘Cuckold’ Wears Name as Badge

LOS ANGELES — In a press release this morning, Marvel Comics announced a new inclusive superhero named Cuckold, a 32-year-old…

4 years ago