comics

Professor X Unsure What to Do With Mutant Whose Only Power Is Knowing When a Bob Seger Song Is Playing on Any Classic Rock Radio Station in AmericaProfessor X Unsure What to Do With Mutant Whose Only Power Is Knowing When a Bob Seger Song Is Playing on Any Classic Rock Radio Station in America

Professor X Unsure What to Do With Mutant Whose Only Power Is Knowing When Bob Seger Song Is Playing on Any Classic Rock Radio Station in America

NORTH SALEM, N.Y. — Professor Charles Xavier, headmaster at Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, is reportedly at a loss…

4 years ago
Sony Acquires Exclusive Rights to All Spiders and Men, Just to Be SafeSony Acquires Exclusive Rights to All Spiders and Men, Just to Be Safe

Sony Acquires Exclusive Rights to All Spiders and Men, Just to Be Safe

NEW YORK — Sony Entertainment has acquired exclusive rights to all depictions of arachnids and men in film, television, and…

5 years ago
Superman Banishes General Zod to Tucker Carlson Guest BoxSuperman Banishes General Zod to Tucker Carlson Guest Box

Superman Banishes General Zod to Tucker Carlson Guest Box

METROPOLIS — After a brutal and bloody battle through the downtown section of the city, Superman defeated the ruthless General…

5 years ago
Man Expected to Remember What Happened in Comic Book He Read a Month AgoMan Expected to Remember What Happened in Comic Book He Read a Month Ago

Man Expected to Remember What Happened in Comic Book He Read Month Ago

RIDGEWOOD, N.J. — Local comic book enthusiast Casey Little was frustrated and slightly offended that the writers of his favorite…

5 years ago
Gotham Rules Batman Can Only Break One Limb on a GuyGotham Rules Batman Can Only Break One Limb on a Guy

Gotham Rules Batman Can Only Break One Limb on Guy

GOTHAM CITY — Gotham City has passed a controversial new bill that would restrict famed vigilante crime fighter Batman to…

5 years ago
We Apologize For Publishing Darkseid’s Anti-Life EquationWe Apologize For Publishing Darkseid’s Anti-Life Equation

We Apologize For Publishing Darkseid’s Anti-Life Equation

We hear you.  This is a fragile point in history, where every voice matters. Particularly when those voices are screaming…

5 years ago
Superman Asks Waiter If There’s Kryptonite in His MealSuperman Asks Waiter If There’s Kryptonite in His Meal

Superman Asks Waiter If There’s Kryptonite in His Meal

METROPOLIS — Local superhero Superman reportedly asked his waiter at a restaurant last night if there was any kryptonite in…

5 years ago
Frank Miller Brings Gritty Noir Sensibility to Niece’s Baby ShowerFrank Miller Brings Gritty Noir Sensibility to Niece’s Baby Shower

Frank Miller Brings Gritty Noir Sensibility to Niece’s Baby Shower

SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Iconic comic book author Frank Miller brought his trademark terse and pulpy style to his niece…

5 years ago
New Marvel Superhero ‘Cuckold’ Wears Name as a BadgeNew Marvel Superhero ‘Cuckold’ Wears Name as a Badge

New Marvel Superhero ‘Cuckold’ Wears Name as Badge

LOS ANGELES — In a press release this morning, Marvel Comics announced a new inclusive superhero named Cuckold, a 32-year-old…

5 years ago