February 2, 2021 Steam Announces Oddly Specific ‘Games You and Molly Used to Play Before You Broke Up’ Sale Steam Announces Oddly Specific ‘Games You and Molly Used to Play Before You Broke Up’ Sale BELLEVUE, Wash. — Online video game retailer Steam has announced an eerily particular sale, seemingly curated exclusively around games you used to play with Molly…
November 25, 2020 Guide: How to Trick Your Boyfriend Into Thinking He’s Letting You Win Guide: How to Trick Your Boyfriend Into Thinking He’s Letting You Win Ever wanted to annihilate your boyfriend in video games without annihilating his fragile male ego? Well with these six simple tips, you’ll be racking up…
October 28, 2020 Boyfriend Takes -7 Environmental Damage Per Second on Mission to Grocery Store Boyfriend Takes -7 Environmental Damage Per Second on Mission to Grocery Store OXFORD, Ohio — In a journey that exposed one of his most glaring character vulnerabilities, local boyfriend Zach McInnes suffered -7 environmental damage per second…
June 17, 2020 Girlfriend Really Dragging Her Feet in Co-Op Game She’s Being Forced to Play Girlfriend Really Dragging Her Feet in Co-Op Game She’s Being Forced to Play BROCKTON, Mass. — Noting the fact that she keeps falling behind to the edge of the screen and dying repeatedly, local gamer Tyler Benson says that…
May 25, 2020 Boyfriend Apologizes for Load Time Boyfriend Apologizes for Load Time SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Recent sexual partner Nathan Stenhouse has released an apology for his unacceptably short load time during last night’s love making session with…
February 21, 2020 Woman Not Excited to Discover Boyfriend Backwards-Compatible With His Exes Woman Not Excited to Discover Boyfriend Backwards-Compatible With His Exes AUSTIN, Texas — Local woman Misty Barnhart was reportedly displeased when she realized that her boyfriend Luis Pratt is backward-compatible with his exes, claiming that…
February 14, 2020 QA Tester Also Good at Finding Flaws in Friend’s New Boyfriend QA Tester Also Good at Finding Flaws in Friend’s New Boyfriend ROCKVILLE, Md. — Gabriel Callahan, a Maryland local and QA Tester at Bethesda Softworks, is also pretty good at finding flaws in his friend’s new…
August 26, 2017 New Boyfriend Clearly Just a Palette Swap of Old Boyfriend New Boyfriend Clearly Just a Palette Swap of Old Boyfriend TEMPE, Ariz. — ASU student Shelly Campbell has started dating local realtor Aaron Jackson two months after breaking up with longtime boyfriend Eric Johnson, who…
August 20, 2017 Man Ghosted by Dating Sim Man Ghosted by Dating Sim TOLEDO, Ohio — A lovelorn man was surprised to see that he had been “ghosted” by Love Bubble Yeah!—a dating sim he had been playing…
