bioware

Mass Effect Devs Compromise With Angry Gamers by Giving Commander Shepard Gigantic, Juicy Balls

EDMONTON — BioWare has announced a compromise for Mass Effect fans upset about the removal of various butt shots in…

4 years ago

Mass Effect: Legendary Edition Adds Advisory for Outdated, Offensive Portrayal of Ass

EDMONTON — Following negative responses to their initial statement, a Bioware press release has revealed their new decision to imprint…

4 years ago

Groundbreaking RPG Gives Player Moral Conundrum With Dozens of Ways to Say ‘Yes’

EDMONTON, Alberta — Developer Bioware has announced that their latest Mass Effect game will be the deepest dive into moral…

4 years ago

‘Mass Effect’ Fan Skeptical That Their Choice in Presidential Election Will Influence Ending

RIVERTON, Wyo. — Avid Mass Effect fan Martin Shore plans to opt out of voting in the upcoming 2020 presidential…

4 years ago

Mass Effect Devs Still Waiting for Anybody to Find the Secret ‘No Sex’ Ending

EDMONTON — Nearly eight years after the release of Mass Effect 3, Canadian game developers at BioWare were baffled that…

5 years ago

Casey Hudson Visits Terminally Ill Teen to Tell Him in Person There Will Be No ‘KOTOR 3’

BALTIMORE — As part of his involvement with the Make-A-Wish Foundation, BioWare General Manager Casey Hudson visited terminal bone cancer…

5 years ago

BioWare Reveals Cryptic Timer to Tease Employee Layoffs

EDMONTON, Alberta — BioWare revealed today that a mysterious countdown image which has adorned its website for the past week…

6 years ago

EA Assures Gamers BioWare Not Dead, Just Going Upstate to Live on Video Game Farm

REDWOOD CITY, Calif. —  This morning, EA told fans of BioWare, the developer of Anthem and Mass Effect: Andromeda, that…

6 years ago

Anthem Set in Fantasy World Where Freelancers Are Valued

EDMONTON, Alberta — Despite receiving criticism for its excessive loot grind, lack of content and “bricking” PCs and consoles, BioWare’s…

6 years ago