September 29, 2020 Historically Shit-Sucking Gamer Thinks He’s Battle Royale God After Unknowingly Beating First Round of Bots Historically Shit-Sucking Gamer Thinks He’s Battle Royale God After Unknowingly Beating First Round of Bots GREENSBORO, N.C. — Local gamer Harry Olsen, who has sucked shit at every single video game he has ever played, is convinced that he is…
September 7, 2020 Fall Guys Developers Somberly Report Every Time Your Jellybean Falls, It Dies Permanently Fall Guys Developers Somberly Report Every Time Your Jellybean Falls, It Dies Permanently LONDON — Developers at Mediatonic have somberly revealed to fans that every time you lose a match in their hit battle royale Fall Guys, your…
September 3, 2020 New Warzone Update Lets You Avoid War Entirely if You Find Enough Cash New Warzone Update Lets You Avoid War Entirely if You Find Enough Cash ENCINO, Calif. — The most recent update to the Call of Duty: Warzone lets players permanently escape participating in ground combat if they are able…
June 24, 2020 Call of Duty: Warzone Update Requires 100GB, a Little Bit of Blood Call of Duty: Warzone Update Requires 100GB, a Little Bit of Blood MIDDLETON, Wisc. — A new update to Activision’s Call of Duty: Warzone requires users to give up 100gb of their hard drive space as well…
May 24, 2020 And When There Was Only One Set of Kills in Duos, That Was When I Carried You And When There Was Only One Set of Kills in Duos, That Was When I Carried You One night I dreamed a team. As I was walking along the storage town with my Lord, Across the dark sky flashed incoming players from…
March 11, 2019 Game Heartbroken After Realizing You Were Only Playing Because of Free Trial Weekend Game Heartbroken After Realizing You Were Only Playing Because of Free Trial Weekend SIOUX FALLS — Indie battle royale Fear the Wolves was reportedly heartbroken after it realized you were only playing for the free trial weekend. “I…
February 21, 2019 Opinion: My Squad Won in Apex Legends. Here’s Why I Refuse to Go to the White House Opinion: My Squad Won in Apex Legends. Here’s Why I Refuse to Go to the White House After days of practice and preparation, my teammates finally reached the mountaintop and got our first squad win. However, because I disagree with the politics…
September 8, 2018 Blast From The Past: Remember PUBG? Blast From The Past: Remember PUBG? Sometimes it’s important to take a look back and remember some of the long history of gaming’s more obscure, forgotten titles. There are countless games…
August 1, 2018 New Battle Royale Game Allows Gamers to Play as One of 100 Battle Royale Games New Battle Royale Game Allows Gamers to Play as One of 100 Battle Royale Games IRVINE, Calif. — On Wednesday, video game developer Uncommon Systems announced a new battle royale game Battle Royale: Battle Royale which allows players to play…
