April 19, 2019 Robert Mueller Offering Unredacted Report to His Patreon Subscribers Robert Mueller Offering Unredacted Report to His Patreon Subscribers WASHINGTON — FBI Director Robert Mueller has announced that an unredacted report on potential Russian interference in the 2016 Presidential election will soon be available…
April 12, 2019 ‘Monopoly II: Aftermath’ Explores Life in Atlantic City Ravaged by Unfettered Capitalism ‘Monopoly II: Aftermath’ Explores Life in Atlantic City Ravaged by Unfettered Capitalism PAWTUCKET, R.I. — Hasbro, in a press release today, announced Monopoly II: Aftermath, a direct sequel to iconic board game Monopoly and the most significant…
April 10, 2019 Local Hole Fan Doesn’t Mind That It’s Black But Doesn’t Get Why They Have to Force Diversity On Us Local Hole Fan Doesn’t Mind That It’s Black But Doesn’t Get Why They Have to Force Diversity On Us ORLANDO, Fla. — Self-described “hole fan” Chris Richardson is reportedly dismayed that the newly discovered “large space hole” by scientists had to be black. “Listen,…
April 8, 2019 Andrew Yang Proposes Universal Crunchyroll Premium for Americans Andrew Yang Proposes Universal Crunchyroll Premium for Americans NEW YORK — With the recent announcement of a price hike for Crunchyroll’s premium subscription service, Democratic presidential candidate Andrew Yang has added to his…
March 27, 2019 Gamers’ Rights Breakthrough: Cory Booker Will Say The Words ‘Video Games’ On Television Tonight Gamers’ Rights Breakthrough: Cory Booker Will Say The Words ‘Video Games’ On Television Tonight ORANGEBURG, S.C. — A leaked portion of one of Senator Cory Booker’s 2020 campaign documents has gamers anticipating an important cultural breakthrough: a presidential candidate…
March 25, 2019 Mueller Report Post-Credits Scene EXPLAINED Mueller Report Post-Credits Scene EXPLAINED Coming off of a blockbuster opening weekend, The Mueller Report continues to dominate the conversation on social media and around water coolers nationwide. Now that…
March 22, 2019 New Tax on Violent Video Games Encourages Kids to Get Outside, Kill Real People for Once New Tax on Violent Video Games Encourages Kids to Get Outside, Kill Real People for Once PHILADELPHIA — The Pennsylvania State Legislature introduced a bill this week proposing an additional tax on violent video games, in a concerted effort to encourage…
March 21, 2019 Opinion: It’s Time for Gamers to Unionize Opinion: It’s Time for Gamers to Unionize There’s a real problem in the game industry. Since its inception, one underrepresented group of people has gradually become abused, taken advantage of, and mistreated…
March 19, 2019 I’m Voting For Bernie Sanders Unless Another Candidate Proves They Have More Swords Than Him I’m Voting For Bernie Sanders Unless Another Candidate Proves They Have More Swords Than Him The 2020 Democratic Primary race is shaping up to be a cutthroat march to the nomination. Well, it was, until I learned that Bernie Sanders…
