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DNC Unplugs Bernie’s Controller


bernie sanders, caucus, dnc, iowa, primary

DES MOINES, Iowa β€” In a tight caucus match late last night, the DNC pulled out Senator Bernie Sanders’ controller cord from the console of electoral politics just as it seemed he was pulling ahead.

β€œWhy isn’t my guy doing anything?” an exasperated Sanders was heard complaining. After frustratingly mashing the keys, he tossed the controller on the floor. β€œI’m so sick and tired of the millionaires and billionaires who run this country playing like screen-peeking cheat bastards.”

When asked for comment, a party spokesperson replied, β€œIt’s our house, we make the rules.”

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