LOS ANGELES — An unexpected reboot of the classic light gun shooter Duck Hunt was announced today that casts the player as a police officer and only allows you to shoot the iconic dog.
“Forget everything you thought you knew about Duck Hunt,” said Lawrence Callahan, who’s studio Buck An Ear Games will be releasing Duck Hunt: Police Edition sometime next year. “This edition will serve as a tribute to our boys in blue, who are unafraid to enter a dangerous situation and just blow away whatever dog they see regardless of how much of a threat they pose. Really hope we honor them with this.”
Many gamers felt offended not only at the thought of a Duck Hunt remake, but the nature of the changes being made to it.
“Yeah ok, but it’s literally called Duck Hunt,” said Kate Simmons, a gamer who was outraged at the announcement. “The point of the entire game is to go out and hunt ducks. Doesn’t the whole thing fall apart if the player with the gun radically reinterprets what they’ve been instructed to do and starts turning the gun on innocent bystanders they deem to be expendable? In the game, I mean. I’m talking about in the game.”
Police defended the game and their reputation, saying they are a deeply misunderstood group.
“Oh the boys are all real excited to play this one, I tell you,” said local police officer Todd Bricklock. “We often get the short end of the stick with our representation in the media, always being portrayed as thugs even though we’re just human beings trying our best. This is the most exciting release since that mod that made everyone you dragged out of a car in Grand Theft Auto V automatically black!”
As of press time, Callahan revealed another feature of Duck Hunt: Police Edition that makes game footage randomly cut out sometimes, due to the player character’s malfunctioning body camera.