May 24, 2018 Outraged Battlefield Fans Demand Historically Accurate 64 vs 64 Matches Outraged Battlefield Fans Demand Historically Accurate 64 vs 64 Matches STOCKHOLM, Sweden — DICE horrified Battlefield fans yesterday when the debut trailer for the latest installment of its flagship franchise prominently featured a British female…
May 23, 2018 Man Never Had Game, But Played It at Friend’s House Man Never Had Game, But Played It at Friend’s House SEATTLE — Despite never owning a copy of 2002’s Godzilla: Destroy All Monsters Melee, local gamer Andrew Schaefer revealed to reporters today that he was…
May 22, 2018 NPC Really Overdoing His One Line NPC Really Overdoing His One Line VADAROK CASTLE — At the edge of East Hills, an area reserved for player resupply in between quests, sources report that a nondescript man known…
May 20, 2018 Report: Young RPG Characters Aren’t Saving Enough Potions to Last Them Through Later Stages Report: Young RPG Characters Aren’t Saving Enough Potions to Last Them Through Later Stages NEW YORK — A troubling report by researchers at the NYU Game Center has found that young RPG characters aren’t saving enough potions to last…
May 19, 2018 Man With Super Mario Ringtone Still Waiting for First Phone Call Man With Super Mario Ringtone Still Waiting for First Phone Call TAMPA, Fla. — Local sources report that Brian Turner, 26, is still eagerly awaiting his first phone call since changing his ringtone to the iconic…
May 18, 2018 GameFly Announces They Are Still Here GameFly Announces They Are Still Here LOS ANGELES — In a press conference outside the building they allegedly work out of, GameFly executives announced that they are, in fact, still operating…
May 16, 2018 Man Lists Favorite Streamer as Emergency Contact Man Lists Favorite Streamer as Emergency Contact LAKE VILLA, Ill. — Sources have revealed that Lyle Baker, 36, recently listed popular Twitch streamer Richard Blevins, better known as Ninja, as his emergency…
May 15, 2018 This is What Mario Would Look Like Without His Pubic Hair This is What Mario Would Look Like Without His Pubic Hair We’re used to how certain characters look in video games, right? And if they’re altered ever slightly, sometimes it can throw us for a loop.…
May 14, 2018 Man Who Did Dishes Rewards Self With 8-Hour Gaming Binge Man Who Did Dishes Rewards Self With 8-Hour Gaming Binge DECATUR, Ga. — After local gamer Joe Massel spent thirty minutes washing a sinkful of dishes, he reportedly congratulated himself on completing the chore by…
