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Man Knocked Out by Agent 47 Starts New Life After Waking Up Next to Chef Outfit



MIAMI — 35-year-old Francisco Guerreros has been living a new life as a chef after a chance encounter with a killer-for-hire left the former security guard without his clothes. The incident occurred last November, as Guerreros patrolled the office building that had employed him for the past ten years.

“I was walking through a back hallway when I heard a coin being dropped in a nearby secluded room,” said Guerreros. “I found the clinking noise incredibly suspicious, so I dropped everything to investigate. That’s the last thing I remember before waking up on the ground.”

Security camera footage shows Guerreros walking into the room and picking up the coin, before being ambushed and knocked unconscious by a bald man dressed as a chef. The attacker, later identified by authorities as the legendary Agent 47, then stuffed Guerreros in a nearby locker after stealing his security guard uniform.

“When I came to, all the alarms were going off,” reminisced Guerreros, whose ineptitude that afternoon led to several deaths. “When I crawled out of that locker, I immediately came to two realizations. One, my job as a security guard was probably over. And two, my attacker had left his chef outfit behind… and it was just my size.”

Guerreros put on the outfit and quickly exited the premises, heading to nearby four-star French restaurant, where he used the chef’s outfit to begin working in the kitchen, despite never being interviewed or hired.

“We never suspected,” said coworker and sous chef, Mitch Simonsen. “How could we? He was wearing the appropriate outfit for the kitchen area! And if anyone did get suspicious, he would just blend in by stirring a pot or chopping vegetables until they forgot what they were worried about.”

After several months, the guilt of his subterfuge became too much to bear and Guerreros revealed the truth to his coworkers. To his surprise, they accepted him.

“He had proved himself by this point,” said head chef, Danny Saunders. “Plus, I respected his hustle. Everybody lies on their resume, but it takes real balls to use evidence from an open murder investigation to sneak into a kitchen and work there undetected.”

Now that he’s no longer living a lie, Guerreros says he is happy for the first time in his life. He also believes it’s only a matter of time before he’s promoted to head chef.  

“I think it will happen within the next couple of months,” he said. “I just need to figure out how to get Saunders alone so I can steal his outfit.”

Check out the newest episode of the Hard Drive podcast where we watch and discuss every episode of 1989’s The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!