Video Games

Gamer Downloads Hot New Multiplayer Game Just in Time for Friends to Move On

BANGOR, Maine — Local gamer Ned Price finally downloaded a multiplayer game his friends have been playing nonstop for weeks,…

4 years ago

Roguelike Fan Also Starts Each New Day With Nothing

ANKENY, Iowa — Unemployed and recently single roguelike enthusiast Daryl Cain says that he feels a strong connection to the…

4 years ago

Gamer Pokes Head Back Into Smash Bros. Ultimate to Play Exactly One Match as Steve

NEW YORK — Local gamer Jesse Nunez excitedly turned on his Switch to download the latest software update for Super…

4 years ago

Microsoft Introduces Donnie and Luca, the Two Guys Who’ll Be Going Around Collecting Xbox Payments

REDMOND, Wash. — Microsoft revealed some further details about its new payment plans for its upcoming next generation consoles, introducing…

4 years ago

Speedrunner Doesn’t Believe Girlfriend’s Tool-Assisted Orgasm Valid

SACRAMENTO — Video game speedrunner Ashton Clemens insisted that a significant portion of his girlfriend’s orgasms were completed incorrectly, arguing…

4 years ago

Origin of Fake News Traced Back to Friend Saying He Played ‘Pokemon Purple’ in 2002

WASHINGTON — Researchers have discovered that the origin of the "fake news" phenomenon stretches all the way back to 2002,…

4 years ago

Game Produced Without Crunch Unless You Count the Delicious Crunch of These Sweet Chili Doritos

SEATTLE — Tire Tactics, the newly released car combat title from Spitfire Games, has been commended for being produced while…

4 years ago

Tony Hawk Controversially Wins Tournament After Being Allowed Two Dozen Restarts

MIAMI — Professional skateboarder Tony Hawk surprised the skateboarding community after winning a tournament by successfully convincing the judges to…

4 years ago

New Study Finds Crows Really Wish They Could Play Video Games

DOWNERS GROVE, Ill. — A study by scientists at Midwestern University has revealed that not only are crows capable of…

4 years ago