September 15, 2017 Teens Caught Dry Humping in Jurassic Park Arcade Machine Invisible to Mom as Long as They Don’t Move Teens Caught Dry Humping in Jurassic Park Arcade Machine Invisible to Mom as Long as They Don’t Move SEATTLE — Two sexually adventurous teenagers were reportedly trapped in the Jurassic Park arcade machine they’d been fooling around in today, fearing any movements would…
September 14, 2017 South Park TV Show Skewers South Park Video Game for Being Liberal Pussies South Park TV Show Skewers South Park Video Game for Being Liberal Pussies LOS ANGELES — The upcoming South Park role playing game called South Park: The Fractured but Whole, which introduces a difficulty mode that criticizes racial…
September 13, 2017 God Punishes GameStop Employees for Building Funko Pop Tower Too High God Punishes GameStop Employees for Building Funko Pop Tower Too High STROUDSBURG, Penn. — Heavenly father of all creation God recently rained His anger down upon a group of arrogant GameStop employees who tried to build…
September 10, 2017 Madden 2018 to Feature Stats of Star Defense Lawyers Madden 2018 to Feature Stats of Star Defense Lawyers NEW YORK — EA Sports announced today that the 2018 version of their popular Madden NFL franchise will now include a crucial component of the…
September 8, 2017 Unknown Filmmaker Jordy Flucas Hired to Direct Star Wars: Episode IX Unknown Filmmaker Jordy Flucas Hired to Direct Star Wars: Episode IX BURBANK, Calif. — Disney shocked both fans and critics today by announcing that unknown filmmaker Jordy Flucas will the fill the recent vacancy at the helm…
September 7, 2017 PlayerUnknown Joins 25th Season of Dancing with the Stars PlayerUnknown Joins 25th Season of Dancing with the Stars LOS ANGELES — Popular video game modder Brendan “PlayerUnknown” Greene announced that he will join the 25th season of ABC’s Dancing with the Stars, today.…
September 2, 2017 Player Stirs Controversy by Refusing to Stand During Madden’s Loading Screen Player Stirs Controversy by Refusing to Stand During Madden’s Loading Screen MADISON, Wis. — Local Twitch streamer Todd McCabe has caused an uproar by refusing to stand during the Madden 18 loading screen. The 32 year old gamer…
August 31, 2017 All Female ‘Lord of the Flies’ Remake Somehow Still Fails Bechdel Test All Female ‘Lord of the Flies’ Remake Somehow Still Fails Bechdel Test LOS ANGELES — A leaked script of the just announced The Lord Of The Flies reboot revealed that, despite starring exclusively women, it still managed…
August 30, 2017 Disney Announces Young Aunt Beru Spinoff Film Disney Announces Young Aunt Beru Spinoff Film BURBANK, Calif. — Disney shocked fans today by announcing that it is working on a new entry in the Star Wars franchise that will tell…
