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Batman Movie Killed on Way to Theatre


batman, ben affleck

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. β€” The Batman, the long delayed standalone Batman film starring Ben Affleck was killed on its way to the box office this evening, being slaughtered by bad publicity, trouble locking down key crew members, and a swirl of sexual harassment accusations against Affleck. The Oscar winning filmmaker has gone into seclusion, vowing to concentrate on his craft.

β€œI’m going to make the films about gritty yet redeemable Boston men this city needs,” he said in a press release. β€œTell Matty to feed my fish, please.”