Entertainment

Marvel Announces ‘Dazzler’ Series Streaming Exclusively on McDonald’s Ordering Kiosks

LOS ANGELES — On the heels of well-received launches of Marvel shows on Netflix, Hulu and Freeform, Marvel revealed it…

6 years ago

New Co-Worker Won’t Shut the Fuck Up About ‘The Walking Dead’

LOS ANGELES — Employees at local bar and arcade The Joy Stick reportedly find Griff Softwick, a new bartender who…

6 years ago

Star Wars Fan Restores Balance to the Force by Only Harassing White Male Cast Members

SEATTLE — Self-described male feminist Stephen Brassinger brought balance to a social media galaxy far far away by deciding to…

6 years ago

Every Person in Comic Book Store Thankful to be Only Normal One

SALT LAKE CITY — All six patrons and two clerks in Salt Lake City’s Moonshot Comics Emporium reported they were…

6 years ago

Roseanne Barr Honorarily Suspended From Overwatch League

LOS ANGELES — After tweeting a racist comment to her 800,000 followers, Overwatch League has decided to give Roseanne Barr…

6 years ago

Movie Studios Get Into Bidding War Over Rights to Ruin ‘Saga’ Adaptation

LOS ANGELES — Several major production studios are reportedly vying for the opportunity to make a sup-par film version of…

6 years ago

Teacher Unsure How to Write Up Student for Hentai Shirt Without Admitting He Knows What Hentai Is

LANCASTER, Penn. — Manheim Township High School teacher David Siegel is reportedly not sure how to discipline Kyle Jackson, a…

6 years ago

PlayStation 2 Last Remaining Way to Play CDs in Apartment

BROOKLYN, N.Y.  — Local twenty-six year old Darren Fitzgerald discovered recently that, in order to show off the CDs he’d…

7 years ago

Opinion: Listen Up Fuckfaces, I’ll Write Whenever The Goddamn Fuck I Want To

Listen up, you pathetic little nerdy fucklits: my name is George Raymond Richard Martin, and I’ll write whenever and whatever…

7 years ago